Every Monday I post Real Life Minimalists, a profile of one of my readers in their own words. If you’d like to participate, click here for details.
I don’t have anyone scheduled after today’s post, so I’d love to receive more stories. I know there are more Real Life Minimalists out there — don’t be shy! :-)
Today, Jenna Ann shares with us her thoughts on minimalism, voluntary simplicity, and homemaking; please visit her blog to read more!
Jenna Ann writes:
Jenna Ann
My husband and I both grew up on the low to middle side of “Middle Class”. Our married lives were more in the “Lower Class” as we struggled to make ends meet, raise our kids and have some of the luxuries of life. We both worked, we lived paycheck to paycheck and we were dissatisfied with the way things were going. Eventually we opted for me to stay home and take care of the kids and the house. Money got even tighter. We didn’t buy as much but we still had the consumer appetite. He worked hard at work and I raised the kids, home-schooled them and kept house. He was depressed because no matter how hard he worked at his job, money was still in short supply. I was depressed because no matter how hard I worked at home, I wasn’t earning a paycheck. We were equating happiness with money but no matter how much or how little was coming in, it all went out just as fast.
Fast forward…our oldest was graduated, married and involved in a great career. Our second child is entering college and the “baby” had opted to go to public school for high school. Wow…all that time now free….what to do? I didn’t want to go back to suffering from “housewife syndrome” like I had in my early days of being a stay at home Mom. I wanted to feel fulfilled, challenged and like I was contributing something valuable to the family. I was also feeling very hemmed in by clutter. So began my crusade to purge our home…which I did by at least 60%. We ALL felt so much lighter after that whirlwind.
Around the same time I began reading about minimalism and voluntary simplicity. It was simple…choose your priorities/passions and get rid of everything else. I had to decide on passions? Ok…I can do that. But most minimalist did it to help free up their lives for mobility. I didn’t want travel. I love being at home! Still, I liked having a lighter load. I also still felt like I wasn’t truly contributing despite all I did to maintain our home. In walked Shannon Hayes with her book Radical Homemakers: Reclaiming Domesticity From A Consumer Culture. Ahhh…now here is me. Here is MY passion! She managed to marry the concepts of simplicty, minimalism and the homemaker and being damned proud of it! For me, nothing embodies minimalism more than attending to the basic needs of life and getting the direct benefit of doing it with my own hands instead of earning a wage and paying someone else to do it for me.
Finally, I’ve found my place!
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Interesting take on things. And I agree–the work of doing things yourself around the house is just as valuable as the work you do for a paycheck. And you don’t have to pay taxes on DIY.
Thanks for sharing.
Thanks for sharing your story. I’m glad you find your balance and happiness! =)
Wonderful story. I think a lot of people equate the journey of minimalism with requiring some big physical shift, like travelling, moving to another part of the world or starting a new career. You always had your happiness, it was just buried under a few layers. Enjoy your bliss!!! : )
Hi Jenna,
I love your story. When my boys were young and I was a stay home mom, the only one on our block, I really thought that taking care of my home and family was a job. Too bad most others didn’t. I will never have to look back and regret not being there when they were kids. Thanks for reminding me of that.
~janet
p.s. I just noticed that you follow my blog. Thank you so much for doing so. Are you a vegan or vegetarian?
Janet,
I am not vegan nor am I technically vegetarian but I’ve managed to get my family to the point that meat is usually just a flavoring rather than a main dish. I think there would be a mutiny if I tried to cut out cheese though. :) Still, I do want to include more vegetarian meals in our diet. I would like to have 2-3 days per week that are strictly vegetarian and go from there.
Jenna Ann
Thank you for being a wonderful wife and having the patience to let me see the error of my ways.
Chris
Chris,
You’re worth it. :)
Jenna Ann
hi Jenna,
Loved your post (on one of my favorite blogs)- it really struck a nerve with me! I downloaded a copy of Radical Homemakers last night, and it absolutely rocks! You’re right, something just clicked when I started reading. It’s so cool to finally find your place, and find others grooving to the beat of the same drummer – thank you!
Carrie,
I have to agree that it’s a beautiful thing to “find others grooving to the beat of the same drummer”. (I love how you put that!) It truly is amazing how much Shannon has one rethinking things isn’t it?
Jenna Ann
Hi Jenna Ann,
I found myself nodding my head as I read your story above. We have been there and still are there as we were blessed with yet another baby two years ago. My kids age range from 22 to 2. In the beginning of March, or 60 days into this new year, I realized what my passion {as you called it} is. I am greatly attracted to the small/minimalist living as a result of reading Jay Schaffer’s Tiny House blog. However, I am old enough to know my limit, therefore, I just do the purging a small bite at a time. I call it Minimize it Monday and Tackle it Tuesday to help me lighten the clutter load in our home.
Jenny,
I think its wonderful that you are recognizing and acknowledging your limits. A certain amount of pushing beyond them is good but going to far usually sets us back.
Still finding empty space. Still giving bags of things away. My mom is trying to hoard papers and trash in a nursing home so every time I visit I take home a big bag to recycle and throw away.
You can choose the life you want. I stayed home and worked some evenings and weekends for years. I learned a lot of valuable skills from older stay at home mothers. Time passes quickly.
Still have the smallest home in my family or circle of friends. Still getting rid of piles of things we don’t need. My husband would like to have lots more stuff but I would be happier with less. I want to give more hobby stuff away. Books and magazines are from the library. I have 3 shelves of books left. A lot of the books we still have belong to my mother or my son.
We went to a small- 40 people- wedding last weekend. It was in a backyard and very
lovely. So much less fuss and mess. Food was served buffet style. Two bottles of wine per table. I have been to fabulous Manhattan weddings which must have cost upwards of $100,000. Country club weddings and destination weddings also cost a lot. Huge, fancy weddings also are bad for the environment.