Every Monday I post Real Life Minimalists, a profile of one of my readers in their own words. If you’d like to participate, click here for details.
This week, we have an inspirational story from Kimberlie Dame. She tells us how a long wilderness trek completely transformed her perspective on material things (and more!). Check out her blog to read more about her adventures.
Kimberlie writes:
Kimberlie
Setting off on an 819 mile wilderness trek can teach you a lot about minimalism. In the obvious, everything needed for survival must be able to be carried upon your back. There is room for items of luxury, but you must be endeared enough to them to be willing to pay in grunt-sweat for them. Without minimalism as a lifestyle penciled anywhere on my goal list, I undertook such a trek on a thru-hike of the Arizona Trail, with the simplified way of life being one of the most permanent and joyful consequences.
When I arrived back home, the enormity of items I had surrounded myself with visually shocked me. I had placed all of these objects under my direct care and with every encounter with them in any given day, they reminded me of bits of my life I was neglecting, projects I had failed to complete, interests I never followed through with, pounds I had gained, cookies I wasn’t baking, letters I hadn’t returned, gifts from people I wasn’t connecting with.. My possessions were draining me of confidence and made me constantly feel as if I was falling short of who I wanted to be. I hadn’t known.
Having made the decision to move overseas in Scotland for an extended period of time, another unexpected no-return consequence of the 819 mile trek, I had a fantastic excuse to rid myself of all of those obligation-ridden objects. I had a yard sale of the grandest scale and free-cycled the rest. (For those of you unaware of the Freecycle Network, I urge you to check it out! I vow to give away something at least once a week.) But I quickly discovered that my new orientation towards minimalism extended well past object consciousness. I also became aware of the burdens of too many activities, job obligations,hobbies, relationships that were no longer vital, food and chemical addictions, noise, stimulation, and habits. Instead of 4 different creative entrepreneurial interests, I picked one and devoted myself too it. Relationships that drained me with their lifelessness were ended in clean and loving ways. I abandoned the demand that all my food be raw, organic, and harvested by chanting hippies on the full moon, and gratefully received whatever was offered to me. I abandoned a need for variety in dress and style and embraced the neutral tone. It was time to allow my personality to be the color and style in my life. Simplifying became a thorough endeavor, and I developed a hearty intuition about where it needed to occur in my life.
I’ve moved back to the States now and have “settled” in Brooklyn, New York for at least few months, however I’m on the razor’s edge line of surrendering to “hobo” for an unnamed period of time. Minimizing my living needs, lowering greatly the baseline of what needs to be present in order for me feel secure and alive, has opened the world to me. I can enjoy places and objects and people without clinging or drama. In the deserts and forests of Arizona, when I experienced anxiety I would simply ask myself, “Am I hungry? Am I in any immediate danger?” If the answer was, “no”, than I reassured myself that I was in a pristine state and could relax. I’ve used the same strategy here in the city. All else is luxurious demand. Minimalism has meant to me that the only requirement I have placed on life for my happiness is life itself. What greater “possession” could you be given?
You can follow my life adventures on www.thenewnomads.com.
{If you’d like to learn more about minimalist living, please consider reading my book, The Joy of Less, A Minimalist Living Guide, or subscribing to my RSS feed.}
“… the only requirement I have placed on life for my happiness is life itself. What greater “possession” could you be given?”
Only a few days ago, my colleague’s young wife died unexpectedly. He says he would give up everything to get his wife back… You would never-ever hear someone say I’d give up my wife to be able to buy stuff…
I can’t imagine the sadness your colleague must be experiencing .. Puts everything right into perspective.. Only in a very violent way…
Dear Kimberlie,
I really enjoyed your post. Especially the part about not having to have your food or clothes just perfect to suit you. Definitely allows for more peace. I read your blog post about Non-Copywrited New Year’s Resolutions for walkers. Like the part about losing sanctimoniousness about one’s own good habits. But, I’d encourage some coverage if you are encouraging people to take their kids to trails!
Thanks, Laura! Yes I’ve learned to enjoy wearing a lot of black things, which I think will just about never go out of style :) And yes, kids add a whole other dimension of responsibility to just about everything :)
Wow, Kimberlie… 819 miles in the wilderness! I’m not envying you on that one.
Still, I think our stories are somewhat similar, as I too have found joy in minimalism after having to live out of a suitcase for some time. (Even though my suitcase was much bigger than the bag you brought, of course!)
I loved reading your story!
best wishes from the Netherlands :)
Thanks, Jurino! Though I’m convinced a suitcase is just a backpack with a better handle .. (and wheels! I would have loved wheels!)
Wow! Wonderful post, wonderful insights. About your change in perspective on the food issue: I travel a fair bit and agree with you about “gratefully receiving” whatever food is offered to you rather than being persnickety about it (which I used to be). I try to only be “picky” if it’s something I actually don’t like, rather than just something I don’t “believe” in (if that makes sense).
Also, what was the genesis of your long hike? Was it an organized thing or did you simply decide to head off on your own?
Hi Ashley! I began that trip completely naive to what I was getting into.. Just had all kinds of romanticized ideas about having some weeks in the woods because I happened to have the break between work projects! It was one of those sneaky life-changing smackers …
I can relate to the idea of your possessions reminding you of all you haven’t done or achieved, or your false self (persona). As I get rid of more of my things, this is the aspect I’m enjoying most – letting old ideas of myself and life go as well.
I didn’t realize how they all drained and overwhelmed me .. hadn’t considered that objects had consequences…
I love your journey to minimalism. Thanks for sharing.
Thanks, Jason .. Love the name “Stop & Breathe” btw
What a dream hike! I bet that was an amazing experience. And it sounds as though your life has become free and adventurous as a result! Enjoy your upcoming “hobo days”. :)
It really was.. In ways I never expected…. And it is true that once you start it’s very hard to stop :)
Thanks!
Lovely!!!! Inspiring and made me think. Thank you. : )
Thanks, Heather!
Really loved the part about throwing out the concept of your food “having” to be organic or whatever and just freely accepting what came your way. Really shows a big change by you, I really respect that.
That also came about by realizing that I was setting up an artificial dependency on certain types of food in order to feel good… Don’t like to empower anything with the responsibility for my happiness.
I love the bit about surrounding ourselves with all the stuff we’re NOT doing. Isn’t that madness? I look around my home and see SHORTFALL. This is not a good way to be living.
And I think it is so subconscious.. I’ve really been able to give myself TOTALLY to what is left!
You had so many good points to make, especially about ridding yourself of the emotional, psychological and spiritual clutter, as well as the physical. I especially enjoyed this point you made: “I can enjoy places and objects and people without clinging or drama.” Your post was very inspiring. My best to you on your journey.
Thanks so much!
Too many things have an emotional price tag on them…
“I abandoned the demand that all my food be raw, organic, and harvested by chanting hippies on the full moon, and gratefully received whatever was offered to me” that is SUPERB. Definitely something I am aspiring to. I’ve always denied myself every kind of food because of fear of putting on weight or being thought of as greedy, putting my hosts into great trouble and then once I’ve gone bingeing on so called “forbidden foods”.
One more obsession I’m ready to declutter from my life.
Thank you and best of luck to you!
Thanks, Mrs. Brady :) I’ve spent way too much time focused on food. I like to be healthy, but also want to be gracious and secure about it.
Wow..Thanks for sharing! I took note of the part regarding draining relationships. I CAN relate.
They ALL take some kind of maintenance, which is worth it for the ones that matter :)
So awesome! I can definitely relate to the belongings you have as constant reminders of things undone. A great burden on us, and so unnecessary. Hubby and I are preparing to nomad in an RV, for short trips to begin with, although eventually full-time. Loved reading how your trek not only changed your material outlook on things, but your mental outlook as well.
Thanks for sharing, definitely going to check out your website!
Bernice
Putting your priorities where they belong
Have fun on your RV journey! I am suspicious it will become full time pretty quickly :) It’s so addictive!
Inspiring story. Reminds me of getting a cancer diagnosis 17 years ago and not knowing the prognosis until test results came back two days later. I had such sharp insight into what really mattered in my life during those 48-hours. Still a whole food eating minimalist striving to live a simple life, that sharp insight has been dulled over time; until I hear a story like yours.
sounds great! i recently left my job and my house in preparation to hike the northern half of the appalachian trail. i drastically downsized, and now everything i own is currently in my fairly small car (i had originally planned to fit everything in the trunk, but as a book lover and dog owner that didn’t quite work out) awaiting my return from the trail. the thought of having the responsibility for those things and having to return to them after living out of a backpack for months is stressful now, and i imagine it will be even more so after the simplicity and solitude of the woods.
did you hike by yourself?
I have to tell you, the statement that resonated with me the most was:
“It was time to allow my personality to be the color and style in my life.”
That’s a really interesting and thought-provoking statement. As I am an accessory whore of sorts…this statement really hit me hard…in a good way. Does a colorful watch, a cute pair of shoes or a fun scarf add so much to my life that I need 100 of them to really express who I am and what mood I’m in today? Am I masking my personality with my “stuff”? One colorful watch, one cute pair of shoes…one is fine. I don’t need several to express myself.
This definitely has given me something to ponder–Thank you so much.
“Am I hungry? Am I in any immediate danger?” If the answer was, “no”, than I reassured myself that I was in a pristine state and could relax.”
This really struck a note with me. I am always moaning and wincing inside my head. Next time I do I will ask myself these two questions and hopefully learn much from my response.
Kimberlie, you are very perceptive and struck a note with me. I never realized that keeping things around that are constant reminders of shortfalls is exactly what I had been doing. I got rid of 80% of my stuff and knew it felt great but I think you are onto something and I now know that is why I feel the environment is better. You put your finger on it.
I’ve also had the experience of keeping stuff around to try to nudge or remind me to pursue certain hobbies or interests or projects. I agree, it can be quite draining! I recently got rid of a couple of foreign-language dictionaries I’ve had for about a decade after finally admitting that I’m not going to learn those languages any time soon, along with a whole bunch of other books that I “should” read, but am not going to,
“I abandoned a need for variety in dress and style and embraced the neutral tone. It was time to allow my personality to be the color and style in my life”
I think this gets much easier as you get older and know better who you are. Growing up in the 60’s, of course we were all about expressing ourselves through clothing, hair, etc. etc. Not so different today, perhaps. Now, a few pieces of clothing or jewelry, neutral, classic, flexible and multi-purpose, are all I need. No need to try to attract attention or make a statement through trendy clothing or accessories. Enjoyed your post.
Your post simply took my breath away. So many serious points to ponder and reflect on… one thing I can’t imagine is how to end a friendship in a “clean and loving way”. What is your secret?
What a lovely, thoughtful post. Thank you for sharing your experiences.
Again taking a carload of things to give away. As we dig deeper, we are finding more things we don’t need. I showed some shirts to my son, he doesn’t want them either so they are leaving the house. I have some dishes I want to give away, my husband wants to keep them, so that may be the next round.
Gave away 2 boxes of dishes and a bag of planters. I am growing more plants, putting them in old cheese and yogurt containers and will give them away next fall. Geraniums on my balcony and Christmas cactus are so obliging. The jade plants grow slowly so they only need new pots every second or third year. When I see pictures of tiny apartments I look at the plants. My cats aren’t interested in any of the plants I have.
More dishes and clothing came in to our home. Gave more dishes away. Another bag of clothing is leaving. Gave away 4 bags of books and my son took 2 boxes to his place. I always find so much to give away. I never buy new craft items. This year I bought a pair of slacks and a pair of gym shoes.
I bought two pairs of nice slacks. I need one more plain top because two of mine have holes in them. I can still wear one to sleep in but the other will have to be a rag or yarn.I like to try to make various craft projects out of old clothing. Or a friend who quilts uses rags to add an extra layer.