Every Monday I post Real Life Minimalists, a profile of one of my readers in their own words. If you’d like to participate, click here for details.
I think you’ll find this week’s story from Lorilee very inspirational. She tells us how minimalist living has brought her family a new sense of freedom and joy—and I just love the beautiful family photo she’s shared with us! Check out her blog to learn more about her journey.
Lorilee writes:
I love simple and minimalist living! It has been a process for us since the beginning of the year slowly getting rid of stuff. In the process we also got rid of our house (we rented it out instead of selling it) and well over half of what we had in it. I feel free!
I just finished “The Joy of Less” by Francine Jay which spoke what I couldn’t put into words myself. I recommend the book to anyone flirting with the idea and needing it spelled out and broken down.
Minimalism isn’t about denying or loosing, it is about freedom, space and time.
What drove us to cutting back and minimizing?
I was getting very tired and stressed out. I was frustrated that I wasn’t the mother, wife or any of the other hats I was trying to wear, that I wanted to be. I was exhausted and discouraged. Stress was really starting to affect my health. Minimizing for me was a way of trying to get my life, what really mattered of it, back.
Also, our true passion is traveling and vacationing with our family, but our stuff was keeping us financially and maintenance wise from doing as much as we wanted.What we did?
I have never been a pack rat. I didn’t have any of the kids clothes or toys (except a few sentimental items) that the kids had grown out of. I did garage sales and goodwill trips regularly. What we had was a fully furnished 2000 sq ft house and it was more than I could keep up with inside and outside.Starting in January we went through the house from top to bottom pulling everything possible out and sorting it in the basement. We got rid of everything we didn’t love or use. Several garage sales and trips to goodwill later we had an empty house. I thought it would be harder for us, especially the kids, to see it all go but it wasn’t at all. It was great! Every trip or sale felt more freeing and made us feel lighter. The cats were the hardest to part with, but they didn’t fit in with the life we were trying to create.
Where are we now?
We moved into town, within walking distance of tons of stuff. We have a 2 bedroom apartment that is small enough to clean and has no exterior maintenance. We keep going through and getting rid of stuff.A bunch of last winter we spent traveling with my husband’s work and staying in hotels. That is my dream to get to with my house. A nicely decorated, inviting and simple hotel/apartment. There is a reason people love to go on vacation… they need to get away… from all the junk, material and time wise. There is no reason why I can’t live in a ‘vacation mindset’ having a clean simple place to live and control over my schedule.
With our move cutting expenses and money from selling lots of stuff we took an amazing 5 week road trip with our kids up into Canada and all down the west coast. We haven’t regretted our move once! Hopefully, with our living costs cut back we can take many more of these family vacations before the kids grow up and move out. Not to mention I feel much better mentally and physically. Simple and minimalist living has given the freedom to have a life.
I have tried to blog through our experience at www.lovingsimpleliving.com as well as all my attempts of simplifying parenting and home schooling. We are well on our way of creating the life we want to have and I am so excited.
Lorilee and her family at Mount Rushmore
{If you’d like to learn more about minimalist living, please consider reading my book, The Joy of Less, A Minimalist Living Guide, or subscribing to my RSS feed.}
LOVE this post. What a great story! I also like that you say that you weren’t a packrat before embracing minimalism. Neither was I! But that doesn’t mean that minimalism was any less of a radical life change.
And the idea of making your home a hotel-like oasis (minus the tack art and the minibar, of course!) is fabulous.
I subscribed to your blog.
It’s amazing how much you can actually make by sorting and getting rid of the stuff that you never use in your household! I’m in the process of doing the same thing and the freedom of winning back your space makes me more happy than I got from all of the things I bought put together.
I’ve always wondered how difficult it must be for families to make this journey to minimalism but you seem to manage the transition nicely, and I’m sure you’re teaching your kids a few things about being frugal and not hoarding stuff. Great job! :)
Meet the gorgeous Lorilee on my site too…she rocks !
Hope the cats now have a more caring home than the one they’ve just left.
Sounds like a fantastic life, but I still feel sorry for the cats :(
Terrible! The pets just did not “fit in with the life we were trying to create”? I can’t imagine doing such a thing, and certainly NOT a good lesson to be teaching their children. Life is not disposable. They made a commitment and promptly broke it. Bad examples of minimalists, to say the very least.
I definitely agree with you, Lynn. And the language she uses makes me wonder: on her website, she says they “got rid” of them. Not found them a new home, just simply “got rid” of them. Usually I enjoy reading about real-life minimalists, but to be honest, this woman disgusts me.
Lynn, I have to agree! It’s terrible how people see pets as possessions instead of living creatures who should be treated with respect. You don’t hear people saying they down-sized their children because they have too many or they don’t fit in with the life-style they were trying to create. Hopefully the cats now have a good home where they are appreciated.
I totally agree, Lynn…the second I read that, I knew this was a person I could not connect with. I don’t suppose she decided to dump her children so her life would be easier. Why should pets be any different? It is a TERRIBLE thing to teach her kids…pets are NOT property, NOT disposable, and no matter how inconvenient they may be…you have a responsibility to give them a good life once you commit to having them. I love reading about minimalists’ journeys but this really gets under my skin!
Sounds like her cats – living, feeling beings – were nothing more than extra “clutter” to her. Despicable! Did she ever stop selfishly thinking about her own life long enough to think about what she was doing to her poor cats lives by abandoning them? Or what kind of example she was setting for her children? I hope to god she didn’t take the cats to a shelter. Having volunteered with a shelter for a few years, I can tell you that most animals that are dumped at shelters die there. Only a very small percentage get adopted.
I have 3 cats and 2 dogs (that’s what volunteering at a kill shelter will get you!), and it’s true that I cannot just jump up and go on vacation at a moment’s notice – and it’s true that it is sometimes quite frustrating. But guess what? My first priority and responsibility is my pets. Sitting here with one of my purring kitties snuggled against me, with his soft chin on my leg, I cannot fathom betraying him by dumping him just so I could be free to travel more.
Lorilee should be ashamed of herself.
I have to agree with a couple of other commenters about the cats. I volunteer at our local animal shelter where I see lots of animals that have been “decluttered” from their families’ lives. Companion animals are NOT disposable.
I agree with Lynn .
I’m so shocked about this lady getting rid of her cats because ‘they didn’t fit in with the life she was trying to create’. Maybe she should have thought about what kind of life she wanted before she took on the commitment of cats. I have just adopted two cats who were the victims of a family break-down – one of them extremely traumatised from losing her home and everything familiar to her and being shunted around a rescue centre, foster carer and then to a new home. There is quite simply no excuse for inflicting this on an animal unless you absolutely have no control over the situation – e.g loss of job and house etc. Yes it’s a big commitment having pets – cats can live to 18 years or more, but once you have them there should be no going back. She wouldn’t get rid of her kids if they stopped her having fun, would she? The whole point of minimalism is to rid yourself of the unnecessary trappings and focus on the important things. Obviously another living creature is not important to this lady, only going on holiday. I find this very sad and don’t think she should be held up as an example.
Yes, the comment about the cats bothered me as well. I hope you carefully chose their new home.
I have to agree with Lynn…very unsettling post.
How does one travel with pets? We take our pug in our motor home, but this minimalist weighed the facts for her individual family and decided the experiences she wanted to give them could not include pets. Let’s not bash the minimalist for her choices. I for one, enjoyed her experiences as I do every Monday. She did not abandon them or put them out on the roadside.
Only some other ways to look at this touchy issue…and a very personal one at that.
I also was unpleasantly surprised by the author’s note of getting rid of her cats. I understand the mentality, I have friends and family members who love animals but do not have pets for this reason, but they thought of that BEFORE getting any animals.
As far as Judy’s reply – the author isn’t travelling full-time, she lives in an apartment! She can take all of the family vacations she wants, that does not necessitate giving up the pets. My aunt takes her two cats in their camper with them whenever they travel (which is often) and the cats do well. When my husband and I travel (infrequently) we either take our extra-large dog when we can, or leave him with a family member. Friends of mine have someone come by when they are gone and take care of their two dogs. The bloggers of Young House Love take their chihuahua everywhere. My aunt (same one as above) has someone stay at her house to take care of her horses while she’s away. It is easily do-able and therefore shocking that she would just essentially abandon all responsibility to the family’s companion animals and get rid of them. I completely understand the mild outrage expressed by these other commenters.
Perhaps the cats just weren’t allowed at the new apartment (in which case, if it were me, I would have found a different place to live).
I do not want to get into an argument about this, but I would like to point out two things. Firstly it is entirely right that people be criticised for choices they make that are morally wrong. Secondly I do not believe that this is a ‘personal issue’. I think it’s a fairly objective fact that it’s cruel to inflict needless suffering on a defenceless creature that you have made a commitment to look after. Even if they’re not actually left on the street, and however nice their new home any change of environment this extreme is terribly distressing for animals. Moreover such casual attitudes to abandonment of pets also increases the strain on animal charities who are already overstretched with animals who are the victims of less avoidable situations – which leads to more animals being put down or never rehomed and living out their days in shelters. I’m sorry, but I feel very strongly about this. I would also add that I always read Miss Minimalist with great enjoyment and very rarely comment – and never before negatively.
Charlotte,
I agree with you 100%. I could not imagine getting rid of my cats simply as an after-thought because they “didn’t fit with my lifestyle.” Whatever! That is a sad and tragic attitude to have toward innocent lives that you have taken the responsibility to protect and provide for. You should only have as many pets or children as you will be able to care for, for the long term. Her children will likely come to see pets as mere accessories which can be returned or discarded if they no longer match your image. I read Miss M.’s blog regularly and sometimes comment, but like you, never have I had such a negative reaction to a post or left a negative comment. I realize that everyone’s minimalist story is different, but I do not think that pets should be cleared out like clutter. That is just absolutely indefensible. They have greater intrinsic value than mere objects. How very sad for her that she does not realize this.
I, too, felt the same way about the cats.
I dislike how some people are taking minimalism to the extreme so they can have a selfish lifestyle. Some go so far as to say that kids are not a part of that minimalist picture so they’re never going to have them, and one guy treks the world explaining how he sleeps around and how he affords such an irresponsible life.
I enjoy minimalism when it falls in line with all the religions that point to the direction of simplicity and when it points to a sustainable planet. Also, the minimalism movement that points toward more time spent with kids and what you love (a pet, a hobby) is a good thing. Leo and Francine are perfect examples using minimalism without being reckless with it. They simply live low-key, regular lifestyles with more freedom; that’s true simplicity (the good, old-fashioned kind).
Bottom Line: I really do pity the cats.
I’m not judging her for getting rid of her cats; all I know is that I couldn’t part with mine. We’ve decided that our lifestyle involves taking care of animals, and that’s more important to us than the ability to pick up and go.
Just once I would like to see someone say “I got rid of the kids because they didn’t fit in with the minimalist lifestyle I was trying to create.” See how awful that sounds? I am less than inspired by this person. Sorry, Lorilee, but I believe you are doing it wrong.
I completely agree! And, she writes about compassion on her blog!
I truly don’t understand why she is getting such negative feedback for having given way her cats…and I am a cat owner! While I am committed to taking care of my cat for the rest of his life, if I were to move overseas, I would rather find him a new home that put him through the trauma of an overseas move. Also, it was probably better that the cats found a place where they would be well taken care of than being carted around everywhere. While the decision to get a pet should not me made lightly and while I feel that pets deserve to be treated well, pets are not children and the giving away of pets should not be equated to the abandonment of children. I DON’T condone the outright abandonment of pets and I’m sure this is NOT what Lorilee did. I’m pretty sure she found a good home for them. Lorilee: I am sure that deciding to find new homes for your cats was not an easy thing for you and your family but I definitely respect your decision. Thank you for sharing your story!
I agree in the event of an unavoidable overseas move re-homing could be kinder. However she didn’t move overseas, and she had a choice. She just decided she wanted to go on holiday a lot.
I taught English in South Korea for two years, and acquired two cats during that time. When it was time to return to North America, we brought them with us. One should simply NOT GET PETS unless they are willing to accept a lifetime responsibility for them. My cats have adjusted to the move just fine because they have their family. It took them longer to adjust to being pet-sat when we went on vacation than it took for them to get over a twenty-four-hour intercontinental journey with their people at the other end. Cats should not be gotten rid of unless you are truly incapable of giving them a good home — not because you’ve decided they’re inconvenient. Cats are living creatures, and they CARE.
Just want to add that we’ve also always taken our cat with us on our every move, including our move from Europe to Southeast Asia and back, with no problems at all. Our cat doesn’t like some parts of the trips but once we’ve gotten settled on the plane, she’s very calm, and once we’ve arrived in our new place, she’s always happy to explore her new environment. Just wanted to share another example of an overseas move that wasn’t traumatic for a cat.
My brother moved from the U.S. to Europe for 3 years and took his 2 dogs. They had to go to a special vet & make sure their vaccinations and paperwork were up-to-date and certified by that particular vet, but they were able to go without a problem. Pets are like family and people who love their pets don’t want to leave them behind. Just check with the embassy or American consulate at the country you want to move TO and see what regulations they have about bringing pets into a country. I know that my pets would be more traumatized by not being with me for an extended length of time than they would be by the move itself. I think to just pawn off pets because you want to pretend like you are always on vacation is just indescribably selfish, stupid, and unrealistic.
Also, what kind of social skills would those kids have if they never experience life in a settled environment, with some access to peers their own age? Homeschooling is one thing, but homeschooling on the move seems like something else entirely. I have several friends who homeschool their kids, and I have seen the good and bad aspects of it. There needs to be consistency so that it will actually inspire learning. Wonder how they will fit that in to their endless vacation?
It is perfectly possible to bring animals with you on long overseas moves. We brought 2 dogs and 1 cat with us from the UK to New Zealand and our child would have been very upset if we had said no, they can’t come with us.
I was also sad to read that the cats did not suit the new life but was then reminded of Francine’s post just below this one on letting go of the drama – and have decided that I can feel sad for the cats without being too harsh on Lorilee.
So Lorilee taught her children that it’s ok to get rid of innocent defenseless creatures if they don’t fit into your preferred lifestyle? Don’t be angry with her, it will come full circle when she’s elderly and infirm – sorry Mom, you dont fit into the lifestyle I want to create for myself…
ps so disappointed that this abuse is featured as a positive example of minimalism. I have been a long time reader but will not visit your site again Francine
Oh Lorilee you’re braver than me to even mention this!
I’m another one on Lorilee’s side here, do you really think it’s a good idea to stay on in a house for the lifetime of a cat when it’s making you unhappy? Most rental appartments don’t allow animals in my experience. My sister is currently stuck in a house, unable to move to a new city and job because she inherited my dead mother’s cats. She doesn’t know how to move on with her life because she feels too guilty whenever she thinks about rehoming the cats. She’s 24.
I believe it’s the right thing to do if you chose to have the cats in the first place which I’m assuming Lorilee did. In your sister’s case it might have been better to have re-homed them straight away rather than take them on herself if it restricted her, but it was kind of her to have done so.
I don’t know where you live, but most apartments in cities and college towns allow pets. Many, many people have pets, so this seems like a cop-out for lack of searching for a pet-friendly apartment/rental house. Every apartment complex that I have ever lived in or visited (friends’ homes) allows pets. Usually they say there is a pet deposit, which is reasonable, since added cleaning may be needed when you move out. Apartments usually say cats or smaller dogs are ok, and there may be a limit, which is usually imposed by the city. I don’t know the rules for every place, but in my town, people can have no more than 5 pets in their home if they live within the city limits. Most places have a policy like that, and rental properties may make their own regulations, one of which may be to have a “no-pets” policy.
Someone wishing to move to a new city should simply contact a real-estate agent in that city (find them online) and say, “I am looking to move to your city, I need an apartment, and I have 3 cats. My price range is ___. What do you have available?” They will help you–they aren’t just there to sell houses. They want your business & potential future home-buying or referrals. They could help you out in 10 minutes, with little effort on their part, and they are willing to do so. I know this because one of my friends is in real-estate and she does this for people all the time. Its great because it keeps pets with the families they love. Everybody wins, so no one should feel that they are “stuck in the house and can’t move because they have pets.” That is just very fatalistic and quite frankly, very lazy.
Alisa, Another point I forgot to mention: For several years, I lived/rented in a small rural town which had only one apartment complex. Actually, they were townhouses, but these were the only rental properties in a 50-mile radius. I asked about the pet policy and the landlady/owner said pets were generally ok. When I told her I had 2 cats, she was relieved, saying, “Oh, cats are so easy. They don’t tear up a place like a big dog trapped inside all day will. Sure, cats are acceptable, no problem.” Like I said, this was a rural area, rental property, and the landlady/owner allowed pets. She didn’t even charge me a pet deposit, and get this, she wasn’t even a pet owner herself! So, I think if your sister did some research and really looked into the new city, she should be able to find a place which would allow her to have pets.
Thanks for your concern Mayfair, but that’s been tried and all landlords say the same. I’m in the UK.
Many landlords are willing to negotiate. We really wanted this apartment, and were able to get the “no pets” policy stricken from our lease after outlining the steps we take to properly care for our cats’ needs and putting down an additional pet deposit. Can your sister visit the city? Our negotiations were done long-distance, but some people are more sympathetic in person.
I missed the mention of cats on my first perusal of this post. On first glance, I was thrilled to see someone moving along items, and planned to come back to comment positively.
Then I saw the part about the cats.
Now, many people take on the commitment of pet ownership without understanding the true commitment that it is. At the same time, people decide to become parents without understanding the true commitment that it also is.
I do hope that Lorilee found a better home for her cats.
For those of you “stuck” with pets, please keep in mind that they don’t live forever. Many of us miss our dearly departed pets, and wish they were still in our lives. Many of us made sure that any temporary lodgings or apartments we moved to would accommodate our pets. We made (and make) sacrifices on behalf of our furry friends.
Eventually, though, you, too, can be pet-free. It’s just a matter of time. But you can also pursue your dreams while having a pet.
Speaking for myself,
I will get rid of every uneccessary material object, but when it comes to our pets, that’s where I draw the line. I actually have more time with our pets now that we have gotten rid of extra clutter and things.
However on the flip side, I would rather see cats in a home where they “fit in” instead of “being in the way”.
Not trying to be harsh, but just being honest.
Heeeelp, Francine!!!
We have two dogs and I just can not imagine how I could part with them. They are our dogs and we are resposible for them, and my children think they are a part of our family. And they are. Truly. In my quest for minimalism I can and will get rid of many THINGS, but never of those alive and breathing.
Francine, why did you really think Lorilee was a good example?
Kurkela,
I agree with you 100%. Pets are part of our family, and they feel this way too. The fact that they are protective, affectionate, and loving to their family shows this. I have told my husband many times, “if there is ever an emergency (fire, etc.), just grab the pets on the way out. Forget the stuff. Nothing else matters.” Lives cannot be replaced. People who don’t have pets don’t understand that animals have feelings, thoughts, and personalities, just like people do. It makes each one unique. I agree that Lorilee was not a good example, but maybe Francine didn’t realize the impact of the cat-disposal because she does not have pets herself. I think she mentioned this in an early, early post, about how she wanted to travel a lot, so they didn’t have pets, etc. I don’t know, but maybe Francine will comment at some point, due to the responses that this week’s RLM post has elicited.
I love cats, but I would get rid of ours in a heartbeat if we could find a good home for her! I’m sure Lorilee didn’t just throw the cats out on the street with the trash! If I was planning to travel extensively, I would think my cat would be better off in a stable home, and not just sitting at home alone waiting for a neighbor/friend/relative/pet-sitter to come feed her!
I myself, will also get rid of every inanimate object and plan never to be pugless!! I will give up traveling,etc before parting with my pet…..but this is not about us, folks. This is about Lorilee. Others have given away their pets before and for various reasons. Are we so quick to attack them? We can not police everyone. We can only learn from examples and choose what we want. This is not for everyone, but they look like a neat happy loving family and I for one, respect their decisions. (I don’t think these children (or the cats either) will end up in a psychiatrist’ office years from now because of this.)
You’re right. With such cavalier attitudes regarding pet ownership, the cats are more likely to end up at the pound…
I’m horrified, not at what Lorilee did with her cats, but with the majority of comments left here today! Since when has an animal aquired the status of a child??!! It’s not uncommon for people to have to find new homes for their pets, and I’ve never heard of a ‘life-time commitment’ to an animal! In fact, many people buy pets thinking it will be a good thing, and then change their minds for any number of reasons. The cats are better off with a family who loves them instead of being kept because of a ‘commitment’. We have had to ‘re-home’ dogs because of incompatibility with our existing pets; do you all think it would have been better for us to keep them and risk them tearing eachother apart?
As for their homeschooling lifestyle, these children will have exciting learning experiences through their travels, and will not have any problems developing socially because they spend time with their parents. I’m sure they will have plenty of contacts with kids their own ages too. There are many families in the world that live this way and the kids grow up just fine. Just because a situation is different than the ‘norm’ in the US doesn’t mean it’s wrong.
Kudos to Lorilee for undertaking such a drastic change in her family’s lifestyle; it’s a big job when you have a family. It will surely reduce her stress and help her to be the wife and mom she was meant to be!!
Re-homing a new pet who hasn’t already bonded with your family is a reasonable choice if integration with your other pets fails. All pets deserve homes free from violence. In this case, Lorilee apparently decided she didn’t love her cats (“We got rid of everything we didn’t love”) and discarded them, permanently, in order to travel. It’s not the same.
We are currently enjoying life with our second rescue dog. Both dogs had a very brief period of transition, but settled in quickly, happily, and lovingly once they realized they were in a loving home where they would be nurtured and cared for with lots and lots of love and attention. To echo what others have said, animals would much rather be in a home where they are loved and receive lots of attention than live in a home where they are in the way or ditched often due to travel.
A good friend of mine got cats for her kids because they begged and pleaded. She is not an animal person at all, but agreed to the cats because it meant so much to her kids. The cats have been driving my friend crazy over the years but she keeps them and cares for them because the kids love the cats so much. But what if the kids said, “Nah, we don’t like cats after all” and ignored them? Perhaps this was Lorilee’s case and she didn’t feel it was fair to the cats to keep them if no one was particularly into them and they wanted to travel? The fact that it was a difficult decision for her tells me she put a great deal of thought into the decision, and probably a great deal of effort into finding them a home where they will be loved.
This humanizing animal conversation is for the birds. Please stop. She already said it was a hard decision to part with the cats and I’m sure finding a good home was key.
Lorilee, I applaud you for the changes you’ve made in your life and the life of your family. Very inspiring story with other big decisions of leaving your home and making your dreams reality. Love your statement that minimalism isn’t about denying or loosing, it is about freedom, space and time.
I often dream about being within walking distance of local amendities, but nothing in my neck of the woods seems possible to that lifestyle. Good luck to you and your families continued minimalist journey!
Forgot to add, that both animals and children are extremely adaptable, and change is easily managed, more so than for most adults. So don’t project your own feelings onto them, as they are different.
[i]”I think you’ll find this week’s story from Lorilee very inspirational.”[/i]
There’s nothing inspirational about this post. The comment about animals left a bad taste in my mouth. In fact, it’s disturbing how easily she glossed over what I would consider to be the most important part. “Oh yes I am now happy and stress free and excited to live in hotels [i]ohandwegotridofthecats[/i] and we travel around the world and its so great and wonderful..”
I volunteer at a no-kill shelter and so many of the cats are there because of the owners. Now, there are valid reasons to give a cat up, but not fitting in your lifestyle is not one of them.
… we got rid of everything we did not love or use…
Poor cats.
I feel that this is one of those recent posts where the real-life minimalist appears more interested in how they and their minimalism looks on the outside rather than what it really means deep inside. It’s not just another trend.
I feel for the cats and hope that you, Lorilee, won’t at some point take that already a cliched step and decide to get your children another pet. If you cannot commit to an animal, let alone two, your minimalist life is not, in my opinion, on solid ground.
I get miss minimalist in email for, and this is the first time besides a couple of the contests that I’ve wanted to comment. I’m glad to see I’m not the only one concerned about the fact that the writer gave up her cats because they were no longer “part of her lifestyle.”
I’m also concerned that she never said she found a good home for them. Did they go to a good home, or just to the pound?
When taking on a pet, we need to remember they are living creatures that need love, nurturing, and bonding, NOT inanimate objects to be decluttered. I am heartbroken that the cats who probably grew to love the owners were so thoughtlessly tossed to the side.
I very much hope that the author did find a loving, nurturing “forever home” with people that care for the cats as the living creatures they are. If the author just took the cats to the animal shelter, then SHAME ON YOU!
I’ve been a follower for less than a year, a minimalist for more than five and a (so many) cats owner for something like thirty, but this is my first comment.
I just wonder how can you call it “minimalism” getting rid of living beings just because they don’t fit… in what?! Shouldn’t it be about useless things? Shouldn’t it be about getting priority to relationships over unnecessary objects? So… maybe a cat is just a “thing” for you?! A thing feeling love, hate, pain, hungry, despair…
Really… how is it possible to allow such a post? I won’t consider such a THING minimalist.
I had to add my 2 cents here.Animals are not disposable.When you adopt an animal you are making a commitment to care for it for life.You do not get rid of an animal because it no longer fits into your lifestyle.I was with you up until that part.I’m disgusted.
Up till now I have never seen a disturbing post om Miss Minimalist. This one is, though.
Taking in a pet is indeed a lifetime commitment – a living being is not to be discarded like your mountainbike or skateboard, when these hobbies are not as appealing to you as they were before.
I wouldn’t ever dream of giving up my daughter, even when she drove me mad. The same thing goes for adopted children. Neither would I ever give up my pets, just because they don’t fit in anymore. The only reason why I would rehome my pets, is if it would be better for them.
During travels a temporary home can always be found, taking enough time in advance.
A considered emigration from Holland to Norway was out of the question at an early stage, because I couldn’t take my Bengal cats with me.
I believe there truly is a difference between getting rid of stuff – inanimate things – and animals.
Lorilee, I admire your quest for less end don’t judge you as a person; it’s just this one action I truly disagree upon and do not understand. I enjoyed the rest of your post.
wow, you guys are funny. This is Lorilee… the above post. I may not have been super clear. We chose to live a smaller life like I mentioned. I had two cats and we had 2000 sq feet. They were mainly indoor cats, but one loved being outside. I have always had cats all my life and love them. We still miss them. I am now living in a 900 sq foot apartment. Cats would be misurable here. They need space and most, need to be outside exploring because that is the way they are wired. If we moved with them it would have been cruel and if we kept a house just for the cats… that wouldn’t be bright.
We adopted both of them (one from the humane society and one as an abandoned kitten who we fixed and got all the shots for). We found them both homes where they would be happy. We didn’t take either to the animal shelter … or heaven forbid get them put down. … sorry if I didn’t make this clear.
Please don’t compare animals to kids. Animals are super special and important but they are not people.
Also, since we moved in May we have been gone for 6 weeks and almost got an overseas job. We are now working on getting traveling work for the next 6 months and hopefully being able to get rid of the apartment for a while. (we are still working on a few options for overseas volunteer employment). Because this is the kind of work and life we are trying to get into I didn’t want to get in the corner with a deadline where we would have not had time to find the cats homes.
Cats don’t travel like dogs, one of mine peed himselves everytime I had to take him to the vet even if I didn’t put him in the carrier. Cats also need people. Last winter we were gone most of 4 months traveling with work and had people checking on them and I felt so bad. They need more than food, water and a clean litter box.
So, don’t hate me or stop coming to Francine’s blog. I am sorry if it wasn’t communicated clearly.
The type of lifestyle you wish to have is something to consider BEFORE acquiring pets. (900 square feet is plenty of space for a pair of cats to live! Why bother mentioning it?)
I went to click “like” on this post, and then remembered I wasn’t on facebook! lol
I completely understand, and I’m sure your cats are much happier in a bigger place! I agree it would be silly to give up your own dreams for a smaller place/travel/minimalist lifestyle just because, as a pet owner, you (apparently) have to make a “lifetime commitment” to your pets!
Selfish Selfish Selfish people.
When you take on a pet IT IS A LIFE TIME COMMITMENT.
Speaking as someone who brought her cat 4000 miles away from where she was raised to a new continent.. I agree with you.
The type of lifestyle you want to have is something you need to consider BEFORE acquiring pets, not after. Animals are living beings, not just THINGS to be “gotten rid of”.
FWIW, 900 square feet is plenty of space for a pair of cats. (Why even mention the size of the apartment as some sort of justification?)
I think you make yourself and your callousness perfectly clear – and what’s funny about caring for the lives of live beings?
I don’t go for your poor explanation.
I don’t think this makes anything clear that wasn’t already. Your actions were selfish and irresponsible. The argument that the cats wouldn’t be happy in an apartment doesn’t wash as far as I’m concerned. Sure cats wouldn’t be happy in your apartment – that’s exactly why you shouldn’d have moved to an apartment with no garden. Of course sometimes people have very unfortunate circumstances (ie job loss, reposession etc) which might make this unavoidable, but this doesn’t apply to you.
You (and some others) simply don’t seem to grasp that you can’t just decide to change your lifestyle on a whim to one that doesn’t accomodate cats if you have already elected to have cats. It’s irresponsible and uncommitted, which is the opposite of everything that pet ownership should be about.
And as for saying that all the people on here shocked be your actions are ‘funny’. Well, I really don’t know what to say to that.
I agree. Cats are perfect for apartments. They don’t need a lot of space. All vets, cat books, or experts will tell you that cats live longer if kept indoor-only. It is safer and they are healthier and live longer. Cats that are allowed to roam freely tend to have an average lifespan of something like 4 years, due to potential accidents, etc., whereas indoor-only cats can live up to 20 years or more. Anyway, my point is that it is a flimsy argument to suggest not taking the cats because you downsized to a 900 square ft apartment. I once had 2 cats & a rabbit in an efficiency apartment and that’s about 500 square feet. We all lived quite happily there for 6 years, so it can be done.
Also, I think the flippant tone of saying, “wow, you all are funny” toward people who expressed genuine concern was a real turn-off to many readers and may have presented the opposite message you tried to convey. Reading the initial post reminded me of the impact a few words can have.
My cats are fine in a 400 sq foot apartment. We’ve intentionally planned spaces for them to snuggle, scratch, eliminate, eat, and climb. One cat loves going for walks on leash and harness, while the other is an incurable homebody. I’m glad you clarified that you found good, responsible homes for your cats, but I am still disturbed and disappointed that you discarded living creatures for your own convenience.
I don’t find this post “inspirational”. This is minimalism taken too far.
Interesting discussion. I have waited when we start to see distractions of our harmony here in minimalist subculture. I think it’s about time. I have started my minimalist path about a year ago and found both negative and positive sides on it. So I’ve found it a little disturbing to read only stories that are happy and harmonous.
About the cat topic. I compare getting rid of cats to getting rid of friends. Even though I know that friends can, or they should be more able to take of theirselves. It’s common minimalist advice to leave relatioships that won’t satisfy us behind. I hope the animals have a good place to live now, but I don’t see she’s done a great sin. Yet I can understand why so many of us are thinking differently.
Overall, I liked this post and the controversy. I’d like to read more about the darker side of minimalism (like perfectionism or carelessness which is shown in this case with pets). Are we ready to see them too? How can we relate to them?
Goodness there are significant judgments being thrown around here. I think this is a matter of whether or not you consider pets to be of the same level as humans. Many animal lovers do, others do not.
I am of the latter group, although I love my dogs dearly. One time I had a cat who drove me crazy! We did not bond… at all. My Mom agreed to take him and he was very happy there, had more land to run around on, mice to hunt, a happy life. The cat and I were both much happier with the transition.
But if I chose to move into a situation for my family that was not beneficial for my dogs, then I would find a better situation for them out of love. Of course, since I would be their owner, I would know them and whether the move would benefit them and they could handle it, and would make a benevolent decision for them, which Lorilee likely did.
Since we do not know the details of Lorilee’s pet transition, it seems a bit rude to assume the worst. She may have spoken a little flipantly of the situation because it was difficult and she just wanted to address it and get through it. If we could offer as much compassion for Lorilee as the “pets are of human-status” animal-lovers are offering for her cats, that would seem fair.
And traveling with her kids will be a fabulous experience for them all.
Don’t look back, Lorilee!
“I think this is a matter of whether or not you consider pets to be of the same level as humans”
————
No, it’s about seeing your pet as a living, feeling being – not just clutter to be tossed out with old clothes and unused kitchen appliances.
I do not think animals are “equal to humans” (nor do I think any of the other commenters do), but that doesn’t change the fact that I am horrified and offended after reading this blog.
It’s disturbing how disposable so many people in our society think pets are. This particular case is on par with the ones where the pet was given up because it didn’t match the furniture.
Ok people please get over the fact she decided to find the cats another home. That is her busy not no one elses. And before you start I have 2 cats and 5 dogs. I lost 1 cat and 1 dog this summer. The cat I lost would never let humans touch him. We would have to trap him in order to get him to the vet. My animals are my children but at one time I had to let a dog go live with my brother due to him chasing calves. The landlord at the time said “get rid of him or I will”. So he went to live with my brother. So all I’m saying is there are many factors when you have pets. If you are going to travel as they are it is best to place the animal with a good home instead of coming and going out of their lives. It is just as hard on them as it is for humans.
As for her lifestyle, I envy her. I hope that someday my life is simply and free.
When you post something on the internet for all to see, you invite scrutiny. The cats were mentioned casually, as if they were just “things”. The readers are entitled to voice their opinions, are they not?
Anything posted on the internet is subject to scrutiny. Other readers are free to state their opinions, whether or not they are in agreement with those of the author.
I DIDNT LIKE THIS POST.
Pets are not children nor are they like friends.
You do make a life commitment to a pet.
It does not become disposable because you become a minimalist.
“Wow, you guys are funny.”
No, we’re not funny, we’re concerned. Thankfully, it sounds like both cats were placed with good homes, so that’s a relief. Perhaps if the initial post had explained the situation as in the comment, readers would not have gotten the sense that cats were simply “gotten rid of,” along with no longer needed material possessions.
Having said that, I personally would have found a way to keep my cats. When I adopt an animal, he or she has found a forever home.
Give me a freakin’ break. They are cats, not kids. Stop putting animals on the same level as humans. The pet strollers, pet coats, pet knapsacks, etc. is ridiculous and makes the owners look looney. If you want a child, have one and have one the right way. But looking like a horses’s a– toting a cat or dog around like it’s a child is ludicrous. They are not on the same level as people or children. If they are given a loving home, then the owners have done the responsible thing. The cat will be loved, fed, watered and taken care of as before and will be happy. They are not logical, reasoning humans. I used to be a pet freak then had 3 kids of my own and animals soon found a lower priority. I realize now, I had improperly elevated them. Lorilee did the right thing in getting rid of her cats (to a loving home) so she her family could have a better quality of life. And this is according to the bible if your a christian because God says to be kind to animals and she was. Beating someone up over giving away and animal because she wanted to give her family a better life really shows how messed up people’s priorities are.
Nobody here is saying that they are kids or even on the same level as kids! Why does everyone who has gotten defensive over the backlash of this blog immediately make that silly argument?
“If you want a child, have one and have one the right way.”????? Are you implying that people who are responsible pet owners can’t have children? Insulting people simply because their opinions differ from yours is ludicrous.
Where are you coming from?! I’m saying if you want a child, have one. Don’t turn your pet into a human baby. Can’t be more clear than that.
Why are you going on a long winded diatribe about “turning pets into human babies”? That isn’t even the issue being discussed by the commenters. Also, there’s no need to aggress- i.e. “horse’s a-” and “looney”.
A voice of reason, thank you Cynthia!
I’m not the kind of ‘pet freak’ that you say you used to be and nore I imagine are most people posting here. Please don’t impose your previous held and now regretted attitudes/behaviour onto anyone else. And as for tne child – pet status thing: why does there have to be a conflict? Unless one of your children is allergic or something like that (or worse, choosing what to save from a house fire) why does there have to be any choice as to which is more important? You should be the committed responsible carer of all the creatures who you have chosen to have as your dependents.
They are not my dependents. They are my pets. One is human, one is not.
Any pet is a lifetime commitment. Pets are not to be bought on a whim because the ‘puppy’ or ‘kitty’ is cute and cuddly. I agree that this is not teaching the children what it means to be a responsible pet owner. I sincerely hope the cats went to a good home where they will find the lifetime commitment they deserve.
I must admit, I had an immediate, gut-level freak out over the cat issue. I read through the comments and thought about it for a bit.
Currently, I have 2 cats and 1 dog. The cats I rescued from a 19 year old waitress who wanted to get rid of them because they were “breaking stuff.” When I went to pick them up from her house, I saw the wreckage – one very expensive, very silly oil lamp. The lamp had been sitting on a low shelf and the curious kittens knocked it over. I happily brought them to my condo where there are very few breakable things and we’ve gotten along since then.
The cats didn’t fit into the waitress’s life style, and I was luckily there to adopt them.
I just added another resident to my condo – my boyfriend, who is allergic. We talked about the situation, and we agreed on keeping the animals out of the bedroom, and daily sweeping. He takes his supplements and doesn’t pet the animals and all is well. Considering the last place he lived had 4 cats and 2 dogs, my place is a huge improvement.
However, if his allergies were more severe, I don’t know what I would do. I love my animals very much – enough to sacrifice a human relationship? Maybe. My boyfriend could find a place to live by himself if we broke up, but the animals are counting on me to provide for them.
Okay,look,I’m not being a jerk here.I’m not saying a cat is like a child.What I’m saying is there is a serious animal overpopulation problem,which is compounded by people deciding they don’t want their pets anymore and giving them up.Millions of animals get killed in shelters every year.If you need to give up a pet for reasons beyond your control,then by all means find him a good home.But if it’s because you want to move into a smaller place,please remember that when you find a new home for the animal,another animal in a shelter who would’ve been adopted by that person will end up dead.I don’t think it’s so ridiculous to be concerned about that.
Thank you Dawn, great comment.
Dawn, You make excellent points. I agree with you. Pet overpopulation and crowded shelters overflowing with discarded family pets will only end up leading to more innocent animals being killed. Buying from breeders also takes homes away from shelter animals.
What I find odd is the few commenters here who appear to be so shocked and appalled that so many readers are disturbed or disgusted by the cat-disposal in the post. It is patronizing for people to say “don’t equate animals with humans.” Humans are animals too— biology check, please. It is also patronizing when some people assume that all pet-owners are trying to substitute pets for children. Many people prefer pets and either do not want children or cannot have children. I do not see the harm. Even for those people who engage in the silly behaviors of pushing pets around in strollers or dressing them in clothing. Who cares? I am not one of those people, but I can see that they indulge their pets out of love, unlike child-obsessed parents who force their kids into pageants. Now THAT is creepy! There are also adults who buy lifelike baby dolls and pretend they’re real, complete with all the accessories. Sure, its kind of weird, but who are they hurting?
I agree with both posts above. Pets are not as just a personal issue. Every year 5-7 million animals go to shelters, and 60-70% of them are euthanized. I wonder how many of these could have been saved if the owners taken the responsibility of pet ownership seriously and not just discarded them like replaceable toys.
Lorilee adopted one of them from the humane society and gave them good homes, so this does not quite apply to her.
But from my experience, the “pets aren’t people” excuse is used to justify all sorts of animal abuse. Whether it is swinging a kitten by her tail or tying a dog by its front legs to a pole in the freezing rain, to declawing a Bengal cat just in case it rips up the furniture the owners haven’t bought yet, the pets aren’t people logic is rarely ever used for the actual benefit of the pet.
I sincerely hope her cats get the care and attention they deserve in their new home.
Exceedingly well made point, Dawn.
They are cats, not humans. It wouldn’t matter if they were dogs, rabbits, chickens, or toads. Everyone jumped to conclusions before the author even was able to respond. All the minimalist blogs talk about getting rid of sentimental items and beds and cars, etc etc — why shouldn’t an animal be the same if you do it in a responsible way (adopting in to a good family just as you would freecycle or donate your gently used items)?
I really enjoyed reading about the author’s process and am appalled at the attitude in the comments. Maybe if you don’t have something good to say, don’t say it at all.
I don’t understand all the furor about the cats. Lorilee has explained that she found good homes for them. Yes, a pet is a commitment, but that commitment is not to hold onto the animal regardless of any other consideration. Rather, the commitment is to act in the interest of the animal, and Lorilee finding the cats a new home was in their best interest. Lorilee had an obligation not to just chuck the cats out on the street or have them put down, and she met that obligation.