When I first began my minimalist journey, my dream was to slowly rid myself of all possessions, until I could live nomadically and carry what I owned in a single bag. I’m happy to say I achieved that when my husband and I moved to England in 2009; we drifted for several years, with the barest of essentials.
Of course, while on the road, we sometimes yearned to settle down—noisy sublets, less-than-spotless hotel rooms, and the hunt for laundry facilities can eventually take their toll. So after our daughter was born, we bought a house; to be honest, I couldn’t imagine having another housing crisis with an infant in tow. It’s not too daunting to hole up in a hotel room for a bit (or even a train station for a night) when you’re footloose, fancy-free, and have failed to find a short-stay apartment. With a baby, it’s another story.
Still, the transition to homeownership has been difficult psychologically. As much as I love our house and neighborhood, there’s something a little less exciting (for me) about knowing where we’ll be in six months. And as nice as it is to put stuff in closets, I sometimes miss living out of a suitcase. The nomadic itch has resurfaced, and I’m once again fantasizing about hitting the road. It won’t happen for awhile; my husband has a great job, and I’d prefer to wait until Plumblossom’s a little older. But it’s an idea that’s occupying my thoughts, and as such, will occupy my blog. :)
Right now, my reality is a kinder, gentler minimalism—and I’m okay with that. At the moment, this lifestyle is more comfortable for my daughter, and accommodating to friends and family. Yet I’m still compelled to explore more extreme alternatives, with an eye towards the future. I enjoy planning and pondering what we’d need as a wandering family, perhaps living in different cities and/or countries for a few months at a time, and will likely devote this month’s posts to that topic.
George Carlin famously described a house as “a pile of stuff with a cover on it.” He went on to say, “If you didn’t have so much stuff, you wouldn’t need a house. You could just walk around all the time.”
I’ll enjoy my lovely little house, and my lovely little garden, on my lovely little lane for now. But to walk around all the time, with my husband and daughter—that’s my minimalist dream.
What’s your minimalist dream? Does it involve putting down roots, packing your bags, or something altogether different? Please share in the Comments!
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I know how you feel! Before I took to the road full-time, I spent a ton of time dreaming about it…what would I take? Where would I go? How would I accomplish all that?
Carrying everything on my back was also my minimalist dream. So happy to be doing it now. :)
I’ve always thought that it would be great to buy a camper van and tour the country, exploring new areas and staying for as long or as short a time as I choose.
Having said that, I love my house, and the nomadic lifestyle would mean that I could not have all of the pets that I have currently, and would have to leave the veg patch that I am slowing trying to build up…so the campervan might be a long holiday at some point :)
Until then. I’ll just try and have less stuff…
Would it be possible to have the house and also take extended trips?
I know how you feel about owning a house.. I would really prefer if we could rent this house from my dad indefinitely, but it would not be fair to ask him to take the responsibility for it, and he needs the money eventually!
But we can probably buy the house with cash, or just take a loan for a few 10K, and the monthly expenses of the house are approximately 300 euros a month as calculated by my dad.
So I’m thinking that it would be entirely possible to have the house and travel or live abroad too if we feel so inclined. So far we have not wanted to, as our daughter has been small. I also really think it would be nice to have a home base to come to. I think she is the kind of child for whom having a home (that stays put) is important. Also, I think she would really miss her family too if we were gone for more than a few months at a time.
I would also like to take extended trips, but rarely, to cut down on the environmental impact.
And I think we may start with just touring our own country with a tent to sleep in :)
I am ambivalent on the traveling issue!!
We used to go on camping holidays as children and i loved that. Just need to persuade the bf to give up his creature comforts and live in a tent with me for a week or two!
I’m so looking forward to others’ stories!
For me, the allure of travel isn’t the motivator, although I’d certainly like to.
What really attracts me is the reduction of distractions so that I can really enjoy every moment, whether it’s spent inside or outside my home.
Without “stuff” there’s less time cleaning and maintaining, more time for friends, meaningful work, and just sitting on the porch drinking coffee or reading, alone or with others.
I’ve managed this at work by digitzing nearly everything I need and clearing my space of everything non-essential (except for a few plants), and have my closet to a glorious minimum, but my husband is less of a minimalist, so we do have a few too many tchochkes for my taste. ;-) They are useful and beautiful, though, so I can’t argue too much!
I would love to live a nomad/ex-pat lifestyle. But I have a few dilemma: what is the impact of constant moving on children? At what age do you start and stop the travelling lifestyle with them? (Especially if you only have just one or two kids.) Do they not need the company of more-or-less constant friends? What would be the impact of not having roots?
I don’t think there is a right or wrong answer to this, except that kids are very adaptable. I currently live with my husband and 2 small boys in China. We’ve been here 6 months (we’re from the UK) and both boys are now speaking Chinese (aged 2 and 4). At the moment we’re contemplating 2 moves in the next few years. Upheaval is a concern, of course, but where there is a stable family life, everyones copes. We made this move to slow down and spend more time with our children (we work SO much less here) and that I think, is an investment in our family life and cushions us a bit from upheaval.
My parents moved nearly every year with my siblings and me while I was growing up. Living in so many different places was a great chance to enlarge my worldview, learn languages, and see awesome things. However, constantly being “new” did make it hard to make friends, and now that I’m an adult I have no childhood friends to keep up with, no close ties with extended family, and no “back home” to visit. I observe my friends in my current location (of 4 years) with thier own long-term friends and family now that I am settled, and I notice how important those strong ties are to them. I’d like to have some myself, but those relationships take many years to form. My husband and I prioritize being close with our children and making sure they spend time with their relatives. It’s intriguing to me to watch them being raised so differently than I was– they have a sense of belonging I never experienced. I still love to travel, but in my opinion, I think my children are happier having stability than I was growing up traveling. I have interesting memories, but they don’t do as much for me now as close relationships would.
I recently returned from a 3-week trip to Southern Africa with my two boys (4 and 7). While they didn’t mind staying on a different campsite every night, they said that they missed their friends from school and kindergarten. To me, coming home from the holiday meant going back to the routine of work, shopping, cleaning etc. My kids, however, were happy to play with their neighbourhood friends again. They loved to be back home in their own bedroom and to play with all their toys.
MY dream is travelling through Southern Africa with a tent for three months. But it is not THEIR dream, and so my dream will have to wait until my kids will be old enough to be without mom for a couple of weeks. Being a mom often means that you cannot have it all!
We’re in the process of sorting out with a view to moving back to Australia next year (currently in UK, came over when my Mum was diagnosed with cancer and she sadly passed away last year).
We plan to be a bit nomadic initially, we see it as a ideal opportunity to go walkabout a bit before settling in somewhere. We have 3 children, age 8, 4 and 2. We are so sick of working to live and want to spend time together as a family as before you know it, our children will have grown up.
Currently we are starting the BIG declutter as even if we were not planning on moving, I still want to live with less stuff.
So our minimalist dream is just to get rid of the stuff that’s tying us down and go have an adventure…life is too short to settle for anything less than your dream.
Good luck to everyone!
Helen :)
I think my minimalist dream is different for different stages of my life. In fact my dream isn’t minimalism. Minimalism is a way to get to my dreams. Right now my goal is to have only enough stuff to fit in the smallest of uhaul’s. I currently have a whole household of stuff, much of it my husbands. In order to accomplish this, he has to be on board with me. He has started to see the value in only having the essentials. I want to be able to move to jobs, not settle for the jobs around me. We are part way there, but still have a ways to go.
Hello Miss Minimalist,
I’ve enjoyed reading the posts on your blog very much, but has not commented yet. Until now, that is. I wanted you to know your posts and your lifestyle have had a lasting impact on me. This is my third year of trying to declutter my house (the goal to do that invariably makes it to my New Year resolutions list and as you can see, is still not accomplished).
Anyway, my minimalist dream. My short-term minimalist dream involves having a clutter-free home while my long-term minimalist dream is additionally having a clutter-free life and mind.
I live in the US and as one can imagine, it is hard to be minimalist in this country. Yet I do my best – keeping myself motivated by reading on the minimalist topic and having like-minded friends.
Thank you for the inspiration and please keep up the good work!
Hmm, this is an interesting question.
I am happy with roots and have no desire for permanent or frequent travel. I like my home comforts and find most travel a bit uncomfortable – I suffer from travel sickness so the actual travelling can be a chore; I have mild back pain so many beds aggravate that; I don’t love high temperatures or the sun; I have a horror of beasties that bite, sting or, eek, even kill…
So, yes, I’m a homebird and my minimalist dreams centre around that.
I dream of a tidy, spacious home and garden; with time and space to spend calm or fun or constructive times with my husband and four kids.
So I’m striving to remove the “stuff” that clutters up my/our life and home – physical, aesthetic and mental.
I still have commitments (family and friends, Parent Council, Eco School) but I don’t fear them or avoid them as being too binding or tying. I accept them as part of the simple life I want to live; as part of a community/network of support.
We all find our happiness and minimalism in different ways. :-)
Karen
(Scotland)
Dear Miss Minimalist,
I recognize the restless itch you write about from when I had my daughter 14 years ago.
Just remeber that children are extremely adaptable. If you want to travel, go ahead. Your child is not a hindrance. On the contrary, their participation on your travels will probably lend you some of their special magic, the wonder of discovery. You’ll see everything anew through their eyes.
So often I see parents who give up “their” life for the sake of their kids, not realizing that the newborn child has joined their life, not the other way around. And kids really are the happiest when the people around them are happy and content, so don’t give up on your needs and dreams! As the cliché goes: If Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy…
I took my daughter with me everywhere from the very beginning. Toys were not needed, whatever she saw me using was what she wanted to play with anyway. Now 14 years later, the result is a outgoing and social young woman who’s still eager to join me whenever I feel like going/doing something, a real relief considering she’s in her teens and could be up to more nefarious activities ;)
Sincerely,
-Tanja-
My minimalist dream would be to have enough money to travel in comfort, since I’m much like Karen (Scotland) when it comes to the physical strain, but also find it mind-numbing to stay in the same spot without an occasional break to see and do different things. I also would like to have enough money to pay a professional service to come into my house and make some things a little less shabby and give the whole place a perfect fresh paint job (white, of course), using non-VOC paint. I don’t want more stuff, more clothes, etc., and in fact have that pretty well down to a minimum. But I’d like to upgrade, just a bit, and not have so much time-sucking DIY in my life!
Actually, Meg, yes. Travel in comfort would be great! If the destination was a peaceful cabin/cottage somewhat disconnected with the busy (electronic?) world, I could enjoy that.
Not sure where I’ll send my husband and four kids while I’m at the cabin…
;-)
Karen (Scotland)
… a little cottage by the ocean …
Perfect! With my gorgeous little Pug playing daily on the beach! Bliss!
I hear you :)
My minimalist dream? Do you want the idealistic one or the realistic one? :)
Idealistic would be trotting around the globe with just a back pack of possessions and giving my children a ‘wordly’ education.
Realistic is paring our house down to the bare essentials, spending our time not chasing materialistic pursuits and home schooling.
:D
That was meant to be a ‘worldly’ education. Also, by that I meant an education that is experienced, not an education that is materialistic (I understand worldly has two different meanings).
I agree on giving our kids a worldly education! I harbor no resentment against my folks, but I feel like I was raised in a cultural shoebox, even though I grew up in what would be called a ‘diverse neighborhood’ and was often the white minority. The US has a very strong culture, but there is so much more – and I want the ‘so much more’ to be normal to our children. ;-)
My minimalist dream is to go where the wind takes me…to live free…even if I stay in one place for a while or decide to travel the world.
Dear Francine,
I am happy to read about the changes brought by Plumblossom in your minimalist lifestyle.
I see minimalism as a “living, breathing” life style. It evolves continuously to suit ones needs and contributes to their inner balance. Any “stage” in one’s life comes with its own adjusted minimalism. And a baby is a big game/stage changer.
Anyway, to put an end to this impersonal/sterile way of expressing my credo I see wisdom in adjusting my life style to what ever comes at me – do some people call this self complimenting? :-)
And yes, I miss traveling – it is one freedom I lost in the recent years due to events I had no control over. I keep promising myself that I will do something about it and when I finally got plane tickets to Europe, I just got word that the airline is on strike. Hope they will end up the negotiations before my flight is scheduled to take off – fingers crossed :-)
I don’t have kids, although I am praying to God to send us a bundle of joy. I am looking forward to hear from you more about the gentle minimalism a baby brings to one minimalist mom’s life.
What’s my minimalist dream?
To get to a point where we own our house and the items within in it, instead of them owning us. Our journey has just begun as we have been working to eliminate the excess from our life and as of yesterday, listed our house for sale.
One day we hope to own a home (not a house) in which it is only big enough to fit the needs of our family. It is designed and decorated with items that reflect who we are. Built on land in which we can sustain ourselves and reduce our impact to our environment. Lastly, continue a life where we are in debt to no one and we control our days and our lives!
It is our dream for now but will one day soon, be a reality! :-)
Well, I’m a newbie minimalist (or perhaps minimalist in training?) trying to figure out where I want this to take me, blogging and de-cluttering and reading and thinking a lot. I do know that while I enjoy travel, I am deeply committed to the idea of roots and am at heart a homebody. This is partly for me about creating a space in my life for contemplation and ease. At 43 I am less interested in wandering with a back pack than I am having a simple home and simple, yet rich life. I have been blessed to travel to Europe several times, and I would be open to having some trips like that in the future. I also love to travel the country visiting friends, would like to go on Buddhist retreats etc… but I’ll always want to have a home base to return to! I am lucky that circumstances leave me now in a lovely little townhouse that I own outright, with all the “outside” stuff handled by the HOA. So I am enjoying making the inside, slowly, a simple de-cluttered “soft place to fall” while always remembering it’s still, like everything, impermanent. That’s the goal anyway, heh!
I believe my minimalist dream right now IS putting down roots. While I enjoy all of the benefits that moving overseas has to offer (I think we both know all of these so I won’t go into it), after 6 months here, I’m ready for the next thing. I think the reason is simply if I know there is a “next thing”, I’d rather start now. Maybe this time next year I actually will be in a permanent living situation–it’s tough for me to imagine. But I am itching to get back to the States and sort through the things in storage and pare down more than I was able to before the move.
My dream is a house just big enough for us and however many children we are blessed with, a garden, good friends or family nearby, and not a thing in our house that we don’t actually use or absolutely love. We’ll see if and when that happens. For now, it is just a dream.
I struggle with owning a home as well. But I know that I am very much a homebody type person and that I do need a place to call all my own. Perhaps what I really struggle with is that homebody tendency, wishing I was a bit more adventurous, and I struggle with the home ownership because I struggle with that part of myself.
Right now my minimalism means more time. I want to spend time, reading, knitting, writing, playing with my son and less time cleaning and dealing with stuff.
“Right now my minimalism means more time. I want to spend time, reading, knitting, writing, playing with my son and less time cleaning and dealing with stuff.”
That pretty much sums up my minimalist dream. Only I don’t knit. I garden and sew and keep chickens.
I think I am rather with Karen, Meg and Kerstin here. But I also think your own background has its influences, as I was discussing with an acquaintance the other day. She said she had grown up on a farm and her parents never left Switzerland so that when she got to travel a little farther afield with her husband and later her daughters, she was keen to show her family that horizons could be broader. When I moved to French-speaking Switzerland at 8, it was my 3rd country and 6th home-move. We continued to move within that area, later in the German-speaking area plus another stay back in England. With family in four countries, when I then had children, we always spent our holidays in the same places and my attitude was that kids can pay for their own travel farther afield when they’re older and appreciate it more (which they are doing). Having said that, they automatically became European citizens and are used to different cultures within Europe, unlike the afore-mentioned aquaintance!
Now that they are grown up I would be interested to travel a bit more and possibly further away, though with the reservations the above-mentioned ladies make, to travel in relative comfort and have a comfortable family home to return to as a base. So my aim is more for my house to be minimalist enough that I am happy to have strangers stay here while I am gone on a prolonged excursion somewhere or off sailing, but I will always want to come back and to provide a base for my family, too, which I simply never had!
For these reasons, I find it difficult to say whether I find moving around with kids good or not – it’s a very individual decision. There is always some danger of having difficulty fitting in, which I know very well from attending an international school for 8 years – you never make close friends, because they are always being moved on with their families (as I soon learnt to my own emotional cost), and it makes you different from “ordinary” folk for the rest of your life to have always been a kind of ex-pat. Some people don’t cope well with this as adults and remain pretty superficial, sadly, or have other difficulties adjusting and forming relationships. Those who grow up “international” often remain in the international circles and I would not choose to be in those myself, now, while in a regular environment, I am always considered an “exotic”. Having said that, I have no siblings – that might have made a difference to have somebody else with the same common background…
Having lived in 44 places in my 57 years, I ponder this question a lot. One issue that i have noticed only as i have gotten older and which saddens me about not only myself but also my children (in their late teens), is the dearth of old-time friends. I see people with friends who have known them since they were little, who have been through the ups and downs with each other and who are still there to help them celebrate and grieve. Having a group of “buddies” who have been there (every day, not just when you “blow into town) with you through thick and thin are a comfort as your parents get sick and eventually leave this earth. They are also a wonder to be with to share those issues that do crop up when you are raising teens. Wanderlust is lovely and I adore it but roots are also critically important. I believe that the true focus of my take on minimalism is a focus on what is important and for me that is relationships with others and appreciation of the wonders of the world. You have to find a balance that works for you.
An interesting aside: When we offered an adventure to our oldest when she graduated from high school, she just wanted to stay home and hang out, she just wanted to spend time with friends and be bored, not what I would have expected for a child that has traveled and moved as much as she has!
My husband and I had a conversation just yesterday about this very subject. We have a 16 year old son and a 10 year old daughter. I was lamenting that our lives are so hectic, despite our best efforts to live more simply. We came to the conclusion that this is a period in our lives where many of our dreams of picking up and traveling are on hold…we have a more pressing dream which is to raise two confident and capable kids. In the meantime, we continue to pare down our possessions, eliminate debt and work on our personal growth so that when the kids do eventually move on, we’ll be ready to go.
My dream is starting to begin, slowly. My husband and
I bought a used class B rv and will be living in it fulltime in 2014. I am weeding out the house and have stop buying “things”. We are taking practice trips right now, to see what we really need. So far food, gas, water and clothes seemed to be it. We will be selling the house, cars and remaining stuff. I have spent months defining freedom and what it means to me and soon I will be experiencing my dream!
My minimalist dream is a house that is easy to clean, so that I can always open it to guests without stress.
Tiffany, what a good goal. For me, that has been the most unexpected benefit of minimizing – the relief of knowing we can have guests at a moment’s notice and be proud of our home. It was not always that way, and I’m glad for the change!
Same here. I want less clutter! I want to spend less time cleaning or organizing and more time living or entertaining!
In addition I’ve always had that taking off into the world at large fantasy… Or the easy move fantasy LOL
I grew up living a different version of the nomadic life. My dad fixed broken companies, which generally took him a couple of years. So we moved a lot. I lived overseas and in Canada for six years and went to 4 different high schools. In college, the registrar hated me because I had to update my permanent address so many times. I yearned for the roots I didn’t have growing up, which is probably why I’m content to stay in one city and give my children the opportunity to graduate high school with the kids they went to pre-K with. But, at the same time, I’m getting the itch. I’d love nothing more than to pack up our bags and live in other countries during the summer so my kids can be exposed to life abroad, while still maintaining their Texas ties. So, that’s my version of the minimalist dream. Being able to live in a different country each summer and giving my kids the chance to educate my kids about the world.
Okay, that last sentence made no sense. I meant giving my kids the chance to learn about the world.
I want to raise my daughter the same way! I have the desire to pick up and move every few years but I feel that it wouldn’t help my daughter to cultivate long term relationships. So I would like to find a wonderful place for her to grow up by the time she starts kindergarten and then spend summers traveling abroad. I feel like it’s the best of both worlds for her (and me)!
This post hits home- I LOVE daydreaming!! And about my minimalist desires? Perfect!
I have bipolar minimalistic tendencies. I am quite selfish by nature, so I’ve come to realize, so in my own private world, I’d ditch everything, rent an apartment in the city, bike/walk/use public transportation, etc.
Realistically, I am a mom of 4 kids ages 6 and under. My hubby works at a school, so we’re tied down by the school year (actually, he’s a principal, so he’s year-round, which makes gallivanting about each summer impossible). I abhor art supplies, but realize I need to keep them on hand for my kids to express themselves, explore their gifts, etc. I am finally realizing that minimalism looks different at different stages. Unfortunately, I discovered it in the midst of kids and all their stuff, so I have nothing to look back on and say, “That’s where I’ll be again in 15 years.”
So right now, we’re paring back, cutting out, keeping the calendar as open as possible, living slowly. Mid-range goals include paying off the house to be free from the burden of a mortgage. Living an anti-consumer lifestyle contributes greatly to that being a possibility not too far off in the future.
My dream is to just own pretty much what I can carry on my back. I desperately want to travel, but right now am in the position of needing to pay off debt for my husbands schooling, as well as staying home to home school my own two children, so it is pretty slow going.
I want to be able to travel the world, maybe settle down for 6-9 months in a spot. I want to wake up with a view of the ocean and spend the morning playing in the waves. I want to write and create art. I want to be able to bask in sunlight and silence, and just be.
Unfortunately my husband is a bit of a pack rat, and my kids always want more, more, more. I am limited by finances and the constant needs of others. So I dream, and I pretend, and make plans so that it may one day work out.
Even though I might not be able to up and leave right now, I already have my personal possessions whittled down enough to do so. At times I mentally tally up what I would take in my imaginary pack. My few clothes (2x pants, 1 skirt, 3x shirts, socks and underwear), iPad and laptop, snapshot camera, toiletries, drink and some small snacks, identification, first aid kit. That and a coat and perhaps a campers pots and pans, cutlery, and plate and bowl set. I really don’t need or want anything else.
One day the debt won’t keep me here, and my kids won’t need so much supervision, and I will finally get my husband to realize that yes, it is possible. Then I will pack up my bag, buy a ticket for all of us out of here, and be gone.
Jo-Anna, your post gave me joy and sadness. I understand where you are coming from as I’m in a similar situation (wanting to be elsewhere but having to settle for what is possible right now). I hope you get to pack your bag and buy that family ticket sooner than you think. *hug*
Jo Anna, something grabbed me there in your post. I see a very tired woman who wants to get out at least for a while, and I see her because that’s the way it was (and probably still is) with me, too. If I may offer a word of advice – do not put so much on your own shoulders, it was your husband’s schooling, not yours, and he himself should be the one to be responsible for that. I bet he is not into art, writing and minimalism, it’s you, and this is what makes it so much harder. Honey, think of yourself more, don’t let it all get you down, get yourself breathers, at least go and sit somewhere in a cafe for an hour at least, your family will manage without you for that time. Get yourself breathers, get up an hour early and enjoy your writing and art all alone and undisturbed. Just don’t lose all that, it will save you. Don’t give so much of yourself to others, think of yourself too. It will get better, children will grow up and the debt will be settled, but in the meantime think of yourself too.
I must confess that when I saw your post I got mixed feelings because you talk about minimalism and also about a permanent desire to travel and to change the place you live in. To me minimalism is a way of living which involves living with less and sticking to the minimum I can have for my needs, and also to cause the minimum impact on the environment, others, etc with my actions = living in a sustainable way, as much as possible.
But wandering around all the time is something I may have dreamed many years ago but it is not a desire now. And I question where does that desire comes from? Why can’t you feel happy in the same place for a while? Why do you get bored? I am asking that because for myself I found that I was always changing outside conditions like job, house, etc, but my true happiness only arrived when I changed my inner self and got contentment from being me, where I was and with what I had, no matter what it was.
I believe life is perfect and we always have what we need wherever we are, even if we don’t like it :)
Regarding children, definitely they are very adaptable and love traveling, but it is also important for them to have a structure. I can tell you that my roots, my stability, and my best memories come from the possibility that my parents gave me to live on the same house for years, to spend summer vacations on the same place, to go to the same beach all summers…. a bunch of things that gave me stability and enabled me to create long lasting relations, and to find what is intimacy throughout the years. Of course on my turbulent teenager years I rebelled to that and for many years I just wanted to travel, to explore lots of places, countries, etc, but because I had that safe place to come back. And I found that it was the best blessing my parents could have ever given to me.
You describe beautifully the reasons why my husband and I are choosing to give stability to our own children rather than constantly travel, as I was brought up doing. It is so true that inner contentment is the key to daily happiness, rather than changing your outside conditions.
My minimalist dream used to be to see how little I can live without – I went from occupying two and a half rooms out of four (I still live with my mother in a very large house, that between the two of us, we fill to the brim!) to having one room full of stuff I don’t want, and having one room with everything I WANT to own – four bookcases (two mostly empty that are only here because my ex threw them at me when she moved away), a sofa, chest of drawers, and computer desk – I sleep on the floor to save space.
Now though, I’m back into martial arts, and my dream has changed. Now I want to get a job so I can afford a two or three bedroom house, where I’ll occupy one room, as I am now, and deck out the living room as a dojo, maybe use the second room as a guest bedroom, so I’m less tempted to use it as a store room (Which I’ve learned get out of hand remarkably quickly while you’re not looking!)
But before then, I’ll still get to live without much stuff for a little while, I intend to fly from the UK to Chicago to live with a friend for a bit, also to Ireland and London to stay with other friends, so I’ll be living out of a suitcase for at least a few months before I settle down :)
Another dream I used to have that I now might do, is to go on a martial arts pilgrimate around the UK. I’m a member of a message board for martial artists, so at some point I may ask people to put me up for a couple of days so I can see different parts of the UK, and sample many different martial arts. That would be awesomesauce :D
My dream is to have a small, 600 to 800 sq ft home (instead of our current 1800 sq ft one) and a travel trailer or motorhome. I love traveling but want a home near my children and grandchildren too. The longest trip we’ve taken was one month when we traveled up the east coast from South Carolina to Maine in a travel trailer. It was wonderful but we were ready to get back home. If we could afford one of those huge motorhomes, I could live in it year round but that’s not going to happen.
I have no real desire for travel, other than to see friends who live around the country. I like camping and hiking and such, but want to be living somewhere permanently where that is easily done on weekend and weeklong trips. I moved around my entire life (Army kid, now Coast Guard wife) and I am SICK of it. I want a real HOME. It is years away, but my husband and I want to design and build our own small, self-sufficient house and have a big garden and chickens. I want to own much, much fewer things than we do now–I want to be able to devote my time to outside chores rather than inside chores, and still have inside be neat and clean enough to relax with a book (from the library, of course!) and a nice mug of tea after a day of canning jam and weeding tomatoes. I am a stay at home mom now, and plan on homeschooling our children for a long time, and I want both of those to continue to be possible…not raising our standard of living, but giving our kids experiences and memories as presents.
As an Air Force Brat, I moved a lot as a child. As an adult, I’ve moved 24 times in 22 years, half of that is with kids. All my kids (10 and 14) want to do now is stay put, and put down roots. We used to talk about traveling full-time in an RV with our family, now we realize how detrimental it would be to our children. We moved close to my family, and are in the process of putting down roots for the first time. It’s hard, but worthwhile. Traveling was easier when the kids were younger, they had a built-in playmate and friend; harder as they get older. And we homeschool, by the way, always have. Just my two cents.
My feelings are very similar to Karen (from Scotland). I’m a senior citizen and while overall healthy, I have some of the aches and pains of growing older combined with an inner ear imbalance that makes traveling difficult and unpleasant. I traveled a bit when I was younger and enjoyed seeing new cultures and meeting people from different countries. But now I’m perfectly content to sit by the side of the road and watch the world go by taking occasional forays to the theater, ballet, opera, etc. (my “outings and adventures”)! I’ve just discovered your blog and the timing is perfect. I’ve collected way too much “stuff” for my small Victorian home and have started purging and reorganizing. Your blogs and the commenter’s thoughts are helpful and encouraging – even if we do have different goals! My idea of heaven would be to stay in my current home but pared down to only the things that are useful or that I love and treasure! And I will get there!! I’ll never be a true minimalist: I couldn’t imagine my life without a houseful of books (I know there’s always the library, but my books are like old friends that I read and reread with much enjoyment). I also have sentimental treasures from my outings and adventures and from loved ones that make me smile whenever I look at them. My minimalist dream? To bloom where I’m planted with roots that go down deeply!! But with less clutter!!!
My minimalist dream and will become reality someday, is to be a missionary here in the USA, helping out my own neighbors and friends. I will have a few simple outfits, a phone, maybe a few pics to hang on the wall, wherever that wall may be and just what I need to get up everyday and help others. I want to be mobile so I can move around the country. I might have a small piece of land and a tiny house in my beloved Texas, just to crash when I need some personal revival. : )
A lovely couple I know with four children recently sold their McMansion and bought an RV. They have been hitting the road and traveling all over the United States, educating their children en route. What a fabulous way to home-school! An admirable way for kids to learn about the United States and its vast history and the opportunity of a lifetime to live in close quarters. They plan to do this for the next year at least.
That’s why I’m building a Vardo! OK, technically, a very experienced, talented architect is building it for me. My boyfriend loves stability and routine and I love wandering and spontaneity. The compromise is the Vardo – a custom slide in camper for the back of my truck. He’s even tentatively agreed to spend a year on the road with me.
i like roots, and travel to me is a vacation once in a while, that said i minimalize alot in my home to free me up for more important things in my life God, family etc i dont worry where i will be 6 month or 10 months down the line, be content where you are, i dont live for minimalism, yes it has helped me, but i realize i cant focus on it,God is my number one focus i am striving for then family and friends:)
i forgot, this important tip, kids need roots and structure in their life:)
My minimalist fantasy is to take my family youth-hosteling around the world for an extended period of time (like a year or so!)…with short camping and hiking trips in there too. My husband loves the idea of doing some kind of survival training in the wild with the kids…so learning to live with very little and be resourceful. I have mixed views on that, but I think it could be a great experience for the kids!
I’m not sure if it will ever go beyond fantasy, probably not, but I am sure we will spend at least 1 or 2 summers doing youth-hosteling and hiking/camping when they are a little older.
For now, my dream is to put down a few roots and just got on day hikes/picnics. We are ready to own a home. I would like it to be small (smaller the better), but my husband and I will have to compromise on that. I think if he can have a modest man-cave/workshop/garage then a smaller home may enough.
I would love a tiny home, but I know my family would not be happy in it. One day when I am old and gray maybe I will have a chance to live that way. Like a gypsy caravan, plain style! A tiny Tumbleweed on wheels in Nordic style would suit me :)
We’re looking at keeping our house as a base so at least the kids can go to school during term time but then go away traveling every time they break up (xmas, summer etc) and live in another country. I am already an expat (being a brit who moved to Canada) and already my son speaks and reads two languages (he is 6yrs)
The question of moving kids around is a tough one. Of course until they get to the age of about 11-12yrs and start developing real friend relationships, they can adapt well to moving. However in the teens, i imagine it can become really a problem if they have the stress of making new friends every time at such a trying age.
I hope our goal is a good mix, keeping a base in one country, where your city or town has good schools, lifestyle but being able to live in another country for a few months at a time during the summer etc.
I love having a home and feeling a home-base. My children enjoy their culture of friends and routines, and while traveling would be such a wonderful experience for them, having a network of friends they see regularly is an important developmental milestone for teenagers. One day, I will have a much smaller house (although our house is small by current standards), but not so small that my children won’t return to visit.
The other part is I am a nurse, and moving a lot, having to learn a new hospital culture all the time would be far too stressful for me. I think I’ll keep a home base, and travel out from that!
Here’s one way to have home, family, and travel all at the same time: http://ticknortribe.com.
I ran across a blog called “At Home in the World.” You may want to check it out. It is a family with four children(I think) who sold the house to travel and are doing their education based on those travels. It may interest you as it hits on how being home free could work logistically with kids, who eventually need to begin their education.
I like the idea of minimalist living out of a bag, but my spouse doesn’t, and since the most important aspect of a family is the people, you are doing well to consider everyone’s needs. I keep thinking maybe I should just take up backpacking to satisfy the wanderlust and keep the home super simple, so everyone’s needs are met.
I LOVE where I live – Colorado. It was always my dream to live here and I don’t have the itch to travel much since I love my surroundings. In fact when I do take trips…I’m always so anxious to come back to my home. I do have a home with a mortgage. I’d like to downsize, but on more land and perhaps a bit more in the mountains. I’m still decluttering but eventually I’ll get to where I want to be.
A thought-provoking post. I’d probably describe my family as living a gentle style of minimalism too. We have much more stuff than an extreme minimalist, but less than average. We are also balanced when it comes to a home base and travelling. We have taken our two young children on extended trips, the first when they were aged 1 and 3 when we travelled for 6 months with a caravan. But we also love being at home and spending time with family and friends and doing nurturing, homey things :)
There was also a very insightful comment above about what can be behind a constant need to travel and see new places and meet new people. This can be a wonderful thing, but can also transfer the search for inner happiness to external things. But likewise, this can also happen to people who rarely travel. It is so easy to switch internal for external satisfaction, and I think it’s a part of all of our life journeys to learn how to find contentment and peace within regardless of our external circumstances.
Although I do love to travel, I feel like I will always need a home base. My minimalist dream is to have a small, comfortable cottage near the ocean. I would like to have the money and freedom to travel at will and see the world. I would need a place to come home to though. My cottage would contain only necessities in order to be comfortable. It would be easy to pack up and go exploring.
In my current life, I do have a house near the ocean. I also have a job, a husband and 2 school age children. We are lucky to live without any debt at the moment. Our priorities include our children’s education and travel. I do what I can to keep our lives simple and to live as minimalists. It is sometimes a struggle to push against our culture of consumerism but we do the best we can. I do think that living with children does force you to live with “a gentler minimalism”. I love my life now but do dream of a day when I might be free to take minimalism to the next level.
I also fantasize about living out of a suitcase, especially since my husband is a full-time telecommuter but our recent move with our 3 year old showed us how traumatizing a move can be for children. I really didn’t think that at 3 he would react as strongly as he did, especially since he wasn’t even in school yet, but he had nightmares and stuttered for weeks after our move. Six months later he STILL asks to go “home”, even though he now has lots of family nearby (the main reason we wanted to move!) I think every child is different and some are probably more adaptable than others but I also remember rejecting summer trips to both Europe (!) and New York as a teenager because I preferred to stay home with friends. I cringe at the thought now, but there you go! My husband and I came to the conclusion that this time with our children is actually so short compared to how much time we’ll have later to travel so our new minimalist dream is to have a simple household and give our children the gift of a loving and stable childhood.
Having read the posts above I’ve realised that although I love the idea of packing up and travelling, I’d still consider the town I have lived for all of my life (except whilst at uni) ‘home’, and would end up back here… Personally, I like having lived in the same place permanently as a child, and the strong sense of home/belonging that comes with that.
I can relate to that. I returned to my home town (a not particularly attractive industrial new town but lovely parks and cheap houses) after uni and a few years in a big city.
It’s both disconcerting and reassuring to see the path where I was first kissed, the bridge I fell on and skinned my knee, my old primary school etc
It’s just home to me.
Karen
(Scotland)