Every Monday I post Real Life Minimalists, a profile of one of my readers in their own words. If you’d like to participate, click here for details.
Today, Nina tells us how she grew up surrounded by too much stuff, but is now forging her own minimalist way!
Nina writes:
I want to thank you, as well as your inspiring readers that have shared your minimalism stories. Hearing that other people strive for simplicity, space and a clutter-free life was such a relief! I find continuous inspiration in the essays and tips that you provide on your blog.
Here is my story:
I grew up with sweet, but misguided parents who believed “if one is good, three is better!” We had a somewhat large house, and every drawer and closet was filled to the brim with stuff. Guest bedroom drawers were too full for guests to use them, the pantry was so full that half of the food would expire before anyone could use it, and – this is the worst of it – my parents had a storage unit to hold their Christmas decorations. A whole storage unit. And not a small one. I spent a weekend helping them find things in their own personal Christmas store and was left with the overwhelming feeling of “This is so unhealthy, and this is NOT what I want for myself.”
As soon as I moved into my first apartment, I wanted to have as little stuff as possible. Of course, my well-meaning parents brought me extra furniture and appliances of theirs since they thought I “needed” to have a popcorn popper and a large computer desk. It was sweet, and came from a place of not wanting me to go without, but I had to learn to say “no, thank you”. Otherwise their stuff would overwhelm me in my new home too. My method now is to smile and say “that’s thoughtful of you, but I don’t need it.” And then I change the subject.
Now I purge stuff ruthlessly, have edited my wardrobe down to the items I love and wear most often, and have recycled/donated/Craigslisted my furniture down to the a comfortable pieces of furniture that I need. When friends come by, their responses to my simplified home are typically, “This space is huge!” and “Your place is so fresh and tidy!” No one has ever commented on it feeling sterile or empty. Oh, and even my parents think it looks pretty nice. Maybe they’ll come around? :)
{If you’d like to learn more about minimalist living, please consider reading my book, The Joy of Less, A Minimalist Living Guide, or subscribing to my RSS feed.}
I love your story & have been reading through all the personal stories over the past few days (I missed about 2 months worth due to crazy changes in my life).
Learning to say no thank you is such a good point!! People don’t always get it, but I love that you’ve persevered and it’s being accepted now :)
I love feeling like there is a community of like minded minimalists all congregating here :) May your beautiful space remain clear & calm ;) xxx
You handled your parents in such a wonderful manner, loving and kind. That is so wise of you. I can just picture your home, open and airy, full of positive energy. Bless you on your journey through a life with less but and incredible amount of more.
Nina…so happy you now have the home environment that suits you. Wished I learn to say “no” earlier in my life!
That story really hits home with me. I grew up in the same type of cramped and cluttered home. Unfortunately for me, some of it stuck with me. Certain “treasures” I thought I just couldn’t part with. Yet, I craved the simplified lifestyle. Well, 5 moves later, and I have been decluttering as I go, and am currently going through a final decluttering, and it feels terrific! Now, when I purchase something it is the 1 in 1 out principle. I found your blog the other day and started following. Now, I have some catching up to do.
I love your way of saying no, it’s so much more eloquent then the way I usually do it! Thanks for sharing your story!
Thanks folks! It’s so nice to be able to share inspiration and know I’m not the only one out there who doesn’t want a bunch of stuff! A simple, uncluttered home is a peaceful one. :)
Your journey sounds so similar to mine. I too grew up in a cluttered house, however my parents have not tried to clutter my house up with presents, thankfully! Thank you for sharing your journey.
Nina, congrats! And by the way…you are right! The clutter is too much. Tune out the noise!
Lovely to read your words,each poster is another inspiration.
Family can sometimes be the biggest barrier to clearing out clutter!!
Nina, your story really resonates with me – I live with my grandparents who have way too much stuff! It’s hard to get them to let go since alot of it is sentimental clutter (right down to old lottery tickets from years ago). They’re also older so my parents and I give in alot! But their room is always so messy and full of too many things! Their clutter really impacts the rest of the family too. We’re working on it – slowly.
Like you, I’m hoping they come around one day too! Kudos on keeping the clutter resolutely out of your home!
I like the idea of ruthless purging. I’ve never done that. I do a little at a time and reward myself with some treat when a huge bag or two leaves the house. Even my husband is now on board and getting rid of some books every week.
I got a new book I wanted for Mother’s Day. Of course, another book is leaving, maybe two. I love drawing books but I usually take them out of the library. I spend a lot of time on art projects and I know once in a while I deserve a gift. What I’d like to get rid of is some furniture but my husband likes to have a lot of places to sit.
My husband likes having 2 TV’s. We had a little one for many years and then he got a bigger one for free. I think 1 small TV is plenty because some days we don’t even turn it on. Some friends have 60 inch TV’s to watch sports. I think our big one is 36 inches.
A TV is nice during cold winter evenings. We watch 2 episodes of something we haven’t seen in years. I still wonder why we need two of them.