Every Monday I post Real Life Minimalists, a profile of one of my readers in their own words. If you’d like to participate, click here for details.
Today we have a wonderful contribution from Susan, who tells us how her 1900-era house led her down the path to minimalism.
Susan writes:
Photo by Susan
This is a story about how I learned to start listening to my house. My family and I live in a large east coast city, in a modest house built in 1900 for working people. There are no grand entrances or roomy hallways, and very little storage space. Our only closets, in the bedrooms, are small and shallow. They are only the depth of a hanger, because in 1900 average working families in our city had two or three outfits that they hung on hooks.
At first, the house was almost empty. Then we received my parents’ old furniture, we had a second child, and the possessions accumulated mindlessly. I grew increasingly frustrated with the lack of storage space and purchased giant tubs to store things in the attic and basement. I assumed that if I could just organize properly we could have everything we thought we wanted in the house, but the house was telling me otherwise. When the kids became teenagers, a sense of being crowded came over me often. I felt ill at ease in my home, like I was wearing ill fitting clothing. Things seemed shabby and jammed into spaces not built to contain them.
But I did not want a larger house to take care of even if we could afford it. So I started purging. First we had a driveway sale to sell off things the kids didn’t use anymore. It was an excruciating experience that I will never repeat, but that weekend was the start of a revolution. I took everything left over to Goodwill and start ruminating on what happens to all the excess stuff we get rid of. Does Goodwill really sell everything or does a good portion end up in a landfill? It was an uncomfortable thought, and I became curious about the life of “stuff”.
I began reading green and anti-consumerist blogs and also stumbled upon Miss Minimalist. Miss Minimalist’s posts were like a drink of water on a hot day, expressing values and a philosophy that resonated with me and I thought “this is it, I am a minimalist”. My mindset changed as I continued to get rid of things and rethink my shopping habits.
With much fewer items hanging in the tiny closet I share with my husband, I don’t agonize over what to wear and I am happier. The old fashioned moldings and wood floors in our house are now more noticeable, so the house’s charm is more apparent. Our “style” miraculously went from shabby to charming. My consumption habits went from mindless to mindful. It is easier now to see what we really need and use, providing incentive to keep things minimal. After all this time I have finally unlocked the key to being right-sized and content in my old home! (Until I can go smaller that is!)
{If you’d like to learn more about minimalist living, please consider reading my book, The Joy of Less, A Minimalist Living Guide, or subscribing to my RSS feed.}
Absolutely spot on! I lived in a 25 square metres flatlet and managed to fill it to the brim with clutter. I always felt depressed, and never realised till I moved out that the flat was actually really cheerful, just overfull. Wise lesson. Then I found It’s All Too Much, Far Beyond the Stars and Miss Minimalist and nowadays people complement me on how spacious my flat is (35 quare metres).
But I am remaining vigilant, as for some reason clutter multiplies itself if you don’t watch it. I’ll be doing another giant sale in a couple of weeks!
I tried googling ”It’s far beyond the stars’ when I clicked the link the page doesn’t open?
Thanks for sharing your story Susan! As someone who just downsized to a smaller 1700 sqft apartment (with my family of 6! plus a golden retriever!!) I can certainly relate (:
It’s lovely having empty spaces around the house isn’t it? I used to proclaim that I loved vintage and fill my entire room with trinkets – but now I just love seeing empty places. It reminds that i have enough, but not too much!
Enjoy your lovely 1900s home! (Envious of the charm & history that I’m sure goes along with it!)
I am so happy for you Susan. So few people live in a home because it is truly what they want it to be. As this way of living becomes refined, you will (as I do) continually pare down possessions and increase peace of mind. Enjoy!
Thanks!
When I moved into my new home I told myself I was not going to fill it up with “Stuff”, 2 years later I was moving stuff around trying to find things. So I woke up one day and decided that it all needed to go. Last I checked Goodwill does sell everything as long as it is in good shape. (trust me I have checked).
Glad to hear that about Goodwill because I certainly relied on them! In Overdressed, by Elisabeth Klein, there’s a chapter about the Salvation Army that is really interesting and illustrates how overloaded with used clothes we are in this country.
Hi Susan, I love your story. That you knew you didn’t want a larger home to care for was such an important bit of knowledge. Staying true to that led you to a life you now love in a home you enjoy. Congratulations!
I also live in a small home and constantly struggle with too much stuff. That’s true now especially since two years ago my partner and I combined households–50+ years of living into a 1,123 sq ft home. I wouldn’t call my self a minimalist; however I tend to lean that way. The light is just starting to shine on that way of life for him.
I recently started a blog called EscapingDodge.com that focuses on our relationship with money. Dealing with your “stuff” is a great way to also get better with money. The topic Myth: He Who Dies With the Most Toys Wins works to combine the two concepts.
Thanks for sharing your inspiring story!
That’s true, the key was realizing I didn’t want a larger home. Thanks!
Thank you for sharing such a beautiful tale of transformation, of finding your true self. I hope minimalism has also helped to strengthen your relationships and given you time to pursue your true passions.
I am intrigued as to what made that driveway sale so excruciating.
I found dealing with people coming over and haggling with me about prices so uncomfortable! And apparently we have some real characters around (I live in a big city).
Thanks for your comments!
Oh, I can just imagine so clearly how this transformation felt for you. I’m glad I am aware of these ideas now before I have bought a house. It makes me hyper-aware that I don’t want to keep buying a bigger place to fit my stuff. A house as small as can comfortably fit my family and nothing more!
You hit the nail on the head. I’ve met too many people ready to “upgrade” their house because they’ve “outgrown” it, when the truth is, they plain have too much stuff.
Insightful and well-worded. Thank you!
You are so right, Susan!
Congratulations on your progress!
My “trigger” has been somewhat similar. I remember how big this apartment felt, when I first saw it and how crammed it felt, when lots of furniture and other stuff had entered.
It takes some time to shove out all that excess, but it’s so worth it.
Well written! I, too, tried to “organize” our house, which is 1100 square feet. It wasn’t happening, and our home has felt much more comfortable since we have gotten rid of excess stuff. Now, we are working toward living aboard full-time, so we will have to downsize even less, to make that space work out. Minimalism is definitely an exciting journey!
We’ve recently moved from a 100sq ft rental and bought a 540 sq ft cottage. We’re a family of four so we seriously had to downsize and let go about half of our furniture and declutter bags and bags of stuff. We’re been here since February 1st. It’s really opened my eyes to just how little we actually need.
I like reading about people who realize the house is big enough. My friend lives in 2300 square feet with too much junk. She has 4 bedrooms full of her stuff. I’ve offered to help her go through her stuff but she’s not interested. Whenever I’ve been there, I come home and sort some more.
Our home is 1600 sq ft. Big kitchen, 2 full bathrooms. I know we could live with less. I try to give a bag or two to Goodwill every week. We also have been giving books to the library each week and craft supplies to the park district and public schools in the area on a regular basis.
There is also a lot of silverware and lots of dishes. Periodically, I thin out the drawers and give away the things we don’t use.
A cousin moved and gave me some large houseplants. I also got some dishes. I am giving away half the dishes and some other dishes. I filled a bag for a day camp in the area, then my son came and took 2 boxes of books out. I have another pile for him to take. My husband found 3 books to give away. That was impressive because he never gives away books.