Every Monday I post Real Life Minimalists, a profile of one of my readers in their own words. If you’d like to participate, click here for details.
This week, we have a truly inspirational story from Jen. She tells us how her family’s minimalist philosophy has enabled them to embrace some amazing opportunities!
Jen writes:
If you saw my house, “minimalist” is not the first word that would spring to mind. Or even the tenth word. I have a family of five and all the accessories that typically come with it–clothes, books, sports equipment, school papers–along with a couple of doting (and shopping-obsessed) grandmothers. Still, I consider myself a minimalist at heart.
Like many of my peers, I have felt more and more the urge to simplify. Part of this does involve our possessions–my husband and I have been making determined efforts to reduce the clutter in our home. (This often feels like “running to stand still,” since we have not been very effective at stemming the tide of incoming items from the kids and the aforementioned grandmothers.) But the decluttering, while it makes our home considerably more pleasant, is not an end in and of itself. It works in deeper ways to add to the quality of our lives.
The first factor is money. While my husband and I have always been pretty frugal, the desire to have fewer things in our lives has made us reluctant to buy much of anything. (I wrote about our sometimes-comical frugality on our blog, How do we afford this?.)
Also, I’ve lately become increasingly conscious of the countless daily decisions that must be made in the typical 21st-century working-parent life. Social scientists have now established pretty definitively that (a) too many options makes us more stressed and less happy with our eventual choice, and (b) humans are susceptible to “decision fatigue,” meaning that having to make too many decisions–even unimportant ones–not only becomes oppressively overwhelming, but also causes our decision-making skills to decline. I think many of us feel this instinctively, but our culture always pushes the idea that when it comes to choice, “more is better”.
Luckily, minimalism can help with both of these things. The connection to money is obvious, but the connection to simplicity is equally strong. If I can reduce my wardrobe to versatile basics, deciding what to wear is simple. If I reduce the number of toys and books in my house, choosing one is much less daunting.
A couple of years ago my family and I got in our minivan and took a five-week cross-country road trip. Packed to the gills with camping equipment, snacks, books, etc., it was hardly a minimalist journey. But at the same time, our daily decisions were greatly simplified. We had already planned our route so we knew where we were going each day. We had a limited amount of food with us, so that was what we ate. (This meant a lot of peanut butter sandwiches, and sometimes lunches in the car that were composed of things like beef jerky and Triscuits. But it was what we had, so no one complained (much)–unlike at home, where with a million options it still seems impossible to find a meal that pleases everyone.) We didn’t have many clothes, so we wore whatever was clean. I had been worried that the trip would be stressful and labor-intensive (lots of driving, and tent camping with three young kids), but was surprised to discover how relaxed and happy I felt. Later I came to attribute this to the simplicity of our lives. And you know what? I didn’t really miss all those fancy meals or my large wardrobe or all the toys we had at home.
Last year we went to meet friends in Italy. I wrote on our blog about being really inspired by a quote from The Joy of Less which talked about the freedom of traveling with just a small bag. We each packed one backpack for our two weeks in Italy, and again wanted for nothing. Our trips have fueled a love of travel and exploration in all of us.
Now all of these elements are coming together. We are now about to start an 11-week adventure traveling around Central America. The money we’re saving is allowing us to fund this break. The decluttering of our house is allowing us to rent it during our absence. Our embrace of simplicity lets us look forward to 11 weeks of living with “just the basics” with a sense of excitement rather than trepidation. Our minimalist journey has been a process of making space–space that was later filled by an opportunity we hadn’t even considered.
You can learn more about our adventures at www.inthebigpicture.com.
{If you’d like to learn more about minimalist living, please consider reading my book, The Joy of Less, A Minimalist Living Guide, or subscribing to my RSS feed.}
Yes, decision fatigue is exhausting. I think you put it well, minimalism means more than just stuff. I look forward to reading about your adventures.
This is a wonderful story about how reducing stuff can create new opportunities you never dreamt of. I think the space it makes in one’s head is the most valuable aspect…this makes space for new ideas. Enjoy your travels!
What a great post! Decision fatigue is a very interesting topic. A minimalist wardrobe certainly helps, and I’ve just created a minimalist meal plan as well – fewer decisions in the day frees up so much brain space! I love that minimalism is such a versatile concept and can be applied to virtually every area of life. And it certainly does make travelling a lot lighter! :-)
Thank you so much for your story!! We are a family of five as well and very often I don´t feel like a minimalist at all because things are just creeping in and I do spent a lot of time and energy on having a simple and organized home.
I think it is all about making decisions : decisions that are right for you. That usually means not one big decision but many, many, many small ones.O a daily Basis. And when you make differnt decisions, you will get different results!I will take our three boys to northern Sweden this summer with only a backpack each and we will also spend four weeks an a little island where no cars are allowed and life in general is rather simple. In order to do that we do not do other things or do without a lot of stuff. I am very grateful that I am able to make this decisions with a clear mind and without being driven or pushed by anything or anyone. Have a save trip!
Jen, so enjoyed reading your post and love the life you are now living!! What fun :) – Karen
Lots of traveling with little baggage. I used to go to 2 or 3 day conferences and see people with huge suitcases. I still can’t imagine what they were carrying. I have a suitcase smaller than a carryon which I take when I’m going somewhere for just a few days. Of course, I take my tote bag for all my pills. I am fascinated with what some people find to be necessities.
What great points! The money saving, the decision fatigue (of course! That’s why I have trouble with de cluttering!), the ease of the small wardrobe…I’d love to hear about Neens Bea’s minimalist meal plan, too.
Great post. Really. Incredibly well written.
On a different note.. Sad miss m is MIA.
We just heard from a cousin with 23 formal gowns. She was yelling at my husband because he and I are going on a cruise with one small suitcase each. Last time we cruised, we wore basically business casual clothes for a week and no one complained. We intend to do it again. For 11 days away, we will pack for a week and rinse out what we need to. We never take more than we can carry.
THis post spoke to me very strongly, as I am the same way: I have a large family, and pets, and the accessories that go with that. But I can honestly say that every item in our home gives one of the family members pleasure. We recently got rid of the kids’ bikes because they were rare,y using them, but the bats and mitts and balls hanging on the pegboard in the garage and are used a lot. Each one of our kids has 4 pairs of shoes — school shoes, dress shoes, athletic shoes, and boots. Each one is worn at least once a week except the boots — but those were used a lot this winter in the snow! We each have pared down on clothing. We have more than we need, but not more than we use regularly and that gives us pleasure.
This cruise we were on a huge ship. We were seated on formal nights in our business casual clothes. The only people turned away had on shorts or tank tops or bathing suits. We didn’t see any 29″ suitcases, but some people had 2 big suitcases each. I was surprised at how dressed up some people get for a vacation. Now I read that the airlines would like carryons to be smaller. I have an overnight bag which would be OK. We each checked through a carryon and had a tote.
We went away for a 3 day weekend, we each took a small bag. We noticed some people took huge suitcases—-for 3 days. This is fascinating to me.
I like to watch how people dress and accessorize. I feel many people are spending money they don’t have to get things they don’t need.