Every Monday I post Real Life Minimalists, a profile of one of my readers in their own words. If you’d like to participate, click here for details.
This week, Elizabeth tells us how moving to Thailand, starting a microbusiness, and living a simple life has helped her family maximize their time together. To read more of her inspiring story, please visit her website.
Elizabeth writes:
Simple living was something I grew up with as a child. Our house in France had little room for stuff. Clothing and food were pricey, so whenever we bought something, we wanted it to be nice and serve a purpose. We valued books and would go antiquing.
Half of my childhood was spent in the States, in a small town in the Midwest. There was initially no superstore like Walmart and we had very few options of things to buy. But shortly after my Father passed away, I moved to Los Angeles and felt the constant pressure to be more and have more. My standards changed and I attempted to mask feelings of inadequacy with stuff. And debt.
Shortly before our daughter was born, my husband and I made the decision to raise her outside the States and had considered moving closer to my childhood home in France. We traveled around for years and ended up on an island in Thailand. We have no car, and live quite frugally. I am in no way, shape, or form the perfect minimalist as I do happen to collect a few things (such as books) but we try to cook often at home and support local small businesses. We value time together as a family, and use natural remedies over conventional.
Life is simple and slow, and frequently boring. But we use our time to pursue creative endeavors and I became an entrepreneur, working from home when I’m not homeschooling our daughter. My husband and I have made it a priority that we both fit work around family life, and not the other way around. He has a holistic health site and works with a friend of ours online, and I do Life + Social Media Coaching as well as freelance writing. Finding the right way to start a business (or a microbusiness) was a huge challenge and it took us years to balance our creative interests with what was in demand (and profitable). In the end, I focused on helping holistic business owners like yoga teachers and Life Coaches with their online platforms. I believe in their work, and want to help them make a difference in the world.
I could never go back to a fast paced lifestyle that places a heavy emphasis on debt and owning as much as possible. I value quality and don’t mind paying more for things that will last longer, but I don’t hit up Target and amass tons of useless stuff either. That being said, there are different ways people we know have simplified their lives. Several of our friends live out of their backpacks, and we don’t view the differences in our lifestyles as being better or more ‘minimalist’. Minimalism and simplicity are both personal choices and therefore differ greatly person to person. At the end of the day, we’re united on our quest of enjoying life more and not being weighed down by possessions or constraints.
One of the greatest influences on our journey to simplicity has been watching how our Thai neighbors and friends live their lives. While some work for the big hotels and are working 24/7, many own microbusinesses or work with their family members. No matter what income level, they generally prefer home cooking or street food to the fancier dining establishments. Foraging for wild fruits and veg is also a regular part of the Phuket life. But like everywhere else, materialism has gained traction here and what the Thais call ‘hi-so’ has emerged: the quest for more beauty, more luxury, and fame.
No person in this world (nor place) is immune to materialism, but we can all become mindful of what brings us joy, and where our priorities lie. If you want good health, focus on high quality food, ideally home-cooked. If you want to feel creatively fulfilled, don’t minimize your hobbies and consider even making a business out of your artistic abilities. If you want more time spent with loved ones, begin researching how to start a microbusiness from home.
Our path to simplicity wasn’t an easy one, but we have no regrets.
{If you’d like to learn more about minimalist living, please consider reading my book, The Joy of Less, A Minimalist Living Guide, or subscribing to my RSS feed.}
Thank you for sharing your inspiring story, Elizabeth! And I agree – I believe there are as many forms of minimalism as there are people practicing it. The only perfect form is the one that works for you.
So glad you enjoyed it Neens and I agree, there are many kinds of simple living and minimalistic lifestyles.
That’s a lovely story, thanks for sharing! We have also decided that we don’t want to raise our children in the states, and want to move to Thailand, but we found it was not possible because of their visa requirements – the only way to move there seems to be to get a job there (which people say is practically impossible for non-thais), to marry someone thai, or to spend lots of money on the long-term visa (something like $43,000 several years ago, I believe). I hope it’s not too invasive if I ask how you found a way to live there? Are you needing to do a “visa run” thing where every few months you have to leave the country? When I read your story, I got so excited, thinking there may be a way to live here that we haven’t thought of or don’t know about yet! Thanks so much for sharing! Sometimes a place people rarely live simply is with their time. Slow, “boring” island/beach life really appeals to us, but many minimalists prefer to be busy beavers, and it’s all okay. :) I love the diversity of experiences on here.
Hey Nicole! We’ve lived here almost five years so I’m kind of an expert on visas lol Your kid may not need a visa and possibly can ‘ride on yours’ so if you come and get a student visa or a three month tourist, depending on their age, they can go on your visa.
Our first year here, we used Siam legal to help us get a one year visa. After that, my husband worked one year and we had a non immigrant b with a work visa. We then did visa runs for some time ( with no problem; we did them ourselves too and not with a visa run service) and finally started going to Penang, where we got three month tourists visas, which you can renew 3 or four times.
I am currently on a 1 year student visa and take two classes a week at the University of Chiang Mai, and my daughter rides on my visa and is a dependant. My husband is still doing 3 month tourist visas. There are many options. You have many options :)
Thanks so much for responding! It seems so overwhelming and impossible, but I think that’s just me not being courageous. It’s inspiring to see people make it work. I’m sorry to ask more questions, but is there a good website that explains all this stuff to people? For instance, with the visa runs, iIm not clear on how long people leave. Do they just show up at the border, or do they have to spend a night or a week outside? Personal preference? We’d love a good guide, as we are generally very introverted and have a hard time finding resources. I’m so inspired by your tenacity with achieving the life you want, and not sticking with what’s easiest or has the most support from friends/family. We are definitely going this path alone, as none of our friends or family even wanted us to move to another state, and the more technical/legal aspects (thank goodness we’re going with homeschooling and don’t have any ongoing prescriptions or medical concerns!) can get frustrating or disheartening.
With visa runs you typically leave and come back the same day OR stay overnight. It’s fast. I mean when we drove to Ranong ( 4 hours from Phuket) people would get on the boat over to Myanmar and come right back, about an hour later. The main thing is just to leave as you get an exit stamp which is sort of that is needed.
I know how you feel regarding going it alone. We did the same but it was worth it.
I love your statement that your life is simple and slow and frequently boring. I am trying to create space like that in our lives, for my children in particular, so that they are encouraged to go outside to play, make cubby houses and have good old fashioned fun without needing to be constantly entertained by others.
I enjoyed reading your story. Thank you for sharing! We also find that preparing our own home-cooked meals using real, whole-food ingredients has done wonders for slowing down our lives (as well as for our health and general well-being).
So glad you enjoyed it Kariane! Awesome you enjoy cooking, we do too!
I am fascinated you met more of the live out of a backpack people. Here in Chicago, the only live out of a backpack person I know well goes somewhere warm or stays with friends over the winter because it is so cold. I generally give her basic things like needles and thread, dental floss, toothbrushes, tea bags or let her pick the rose hips behind my building. I am filling a bag of things now to give her since I will see her this weekend.
Hi Elizabeth,
A great story, thanks for sharing, and good on you for working with businesses that leave a positive impact on the world. :)
My daughter,age 38, came over with a big basket of clothes to wash so she can give them to a friend who is living on disability. I am so happy she is finally going through some of her things. At one time she had 6 or 7 big baskets of clothes she wasn’t wearing. I just passed an old purse to my mom, because she ruined her old purse with cookie crumbs and wet tea bags, and whatever other food items she was putting in her purse.
Things in our family frequently get passed around. My husband and both sons have given me clothing. I have given clothing to my mother and my daughter. Everyone wears things differently. I change the buttons or wear a big pin, for example.
I have been teaching classes in making jewelry out of paper, rags, buttons and other found objects. Previous generations didn’t waste scraps like we do. I have read about taking wool sweaters that have shrunk, shrinking them further, dying them and making rugs out of them or unravelling sweaters and making them into something else.