Real Life Minimalists Update: Bethany

Every Monday I post Real Life Minimalists, a profile of one of my readers in their own words. If you’d like to participate, click here for details.

This week, we have an update from Bethany. She shared her story with us in 2012 and 2014, and is back to fill us in on her recent experiences. Isn’t it wonderful to see these minimalist stories evolve over the years? Check out her blog to read more.

Bethany writes:

Full Circle

It has been 5 years since I first wrote for Miss Minimalist. Back then, I was spending the summer sailing the Great Lakes on a 29-foot boat with my husband and daughter. After spending 93 days on the water, we were not happy to be back on land. I taught special education, and it did not bring me the joy that it once had.

In the summer of 2013, we packed up all of our belongings into our Volvo station wagon and drove from Michigan to Houston. I had found a teaching job, and a year later, we moved onto a 35-foot sailboat. We were living in 100 square feet of space at that time, and my husband and I were sharing a twin mattress. In 2015, we moved onto our second boat, a 37-foot center cockpit sailboat.

While we were living in a small space, I found that I was moving away from minimalism. It became clear that my blog had run its course, so I wrote my last post and got a Facebook account. We bought Smartphones. My husband began working part-time, and my job slowly began to consume all of my time. We ate fast food. My growing wardrobe spilled over into the storage unit we were renting. I took out multiple bags of garbage a day. The only thing that kept me grounded at all was yoga. I had practiced on and off since we moved to Texas, but two years ago I began practicing regularly at a small, tight-knit studio. Yoga brought my mind back from the chaos and busy-ness, at least temporarily.

Last summer, we had an opportunity to buy a 47-foot cruiser. This was not a sailboat, but with my husband’s job at the marina where we lived, we would likely not be sailing away anytime soon. The boat had nearly sunk once, and my husband had helped rescue it. Because of this, it had no carpet or wallpaper. We moved onto this boat, fixing it up while we lived on it, and that fall we weathered Hurricane Harvey on it.

Harvey plunged life into a chaos that lasted the rest of the school year. I was in a dangerous and abusive situation at my job, which led me to finally resign. Only after I left and gave myself time to heal, did I realize how unhappy I had been there. I had only stayed, because I thought that full-time employment there meant security. I was willing to subject myself to an unreasonable amount of stress and drama, in the name of perceived security. Now every option was available to me, and we would find a way to make it work. I decided to take the summer off and pursue substitute teaching in the fall. The lack of stress and freedom to choose which days to work will give me the breathing room I deperately need.

As I settled in at home, I noticed how cluttered our boat had become. I mentioned this to my yoga teacher, and she said, “If the external is chaotic, the internal can never be at peace.” So it was time to start decluttering once again. I took it slow, following the Fly Lady’s system, and I immediately noticed a change in our home. Our evenings were more relaxed, and we seemed more at peace with each other.

One of the items I purged was my Smartphone. I accidentally dropped it in Clear Lake one day, and we decided to replace it with a flip phone. My husband bought himself a flip phone as well, and we enjoyed going out without the distraction of Messenger and the temptation to check social media.

At the same time, I became intentional with how I was spending the rest of my time. I realized that I had some friendships that were rooted in negativity, and that, no matter what I did, our interactions led me to revert to my old habits. It was painful to let these go, but I have found new positive and like-minded friends.

Being intentional also meant revisiting the Facebook issue. I was spending hours on Facebook, even without a Smartphone, and I usually felt angry after spending time reading my newsfeed. I gave my contact information to the friends I wished to stay in touch with, and deleted my account. Instead of spending time on Facebook, I began writing, and my new blog was born.

Coming back to minimalism has been like returning home.

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{If you’d like to learn more about minimalist living, please consider reading my book, The Joy of Less, A Minimalist Living Guide, or joining my email list.}